Previous Endeavors
by TroutyHawk
Summary: Sam stood up uneasily, throwing out a few raspy coughs before limping away on his long walk home in his tightly snug undergarments and battle scars, left with nothing but the thoughts of his previous endeavors, constantly seeking things to fill the hole in his heart left by the things…and people…that he had left behind him in Ohio.
1. Chapter 1

I'm not Ryan Murphy.

I do not own Glee or the characters.

Although, I probably can write them better.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Previous Endeavors  
**

**Chapter One.****  
**

[Sometimes, reality can really be a kick in the ass]

* * *

Sam warily lifted his head with effort. It felt like it weighed a million pounds. Everything was black and he couldn't decipher if this was because the lights were out or because he couldn't remember how to open his eyes.

"Get up."

Was he in a dream, was he even real? Who was he even or where was he, most importantly. His eyes flickered open, his vision casted over with a red hue. He felt a warm thick trickle down the side of his face, quickly chilled by the breeze that washed over him like a cold wave causing him to shake a little from the uncomfortable sensation. This was the first time he felt alive, unfortunately. The first thing to move was his arm to bring his hand up to his cheek, feeling the cold sticky substance that graced his temple, flowing down to his cheek and across his jawline. When his hand pulled away, his own blood graced his fingertips and upper palm and his eyes darted away instantly in a state of déjà vu.

Echoing laughter filled the air, quiet at first then pulling in like an inviting symphony, full of joy and just pure happiness.

Sam closed his eyes and took in a deep but painfully strained breath as he tilted his head back, letting the memory fill his body from head to toe, his blood stained hand tingling from the continuing breeze.

_An all familiar and welcomed face appeared as the giggling and smiling developed across the lips of Mercedes Jones. Arms wrapped around her as the figure behind her developed into Sam Evans himself, laughing with her and planting kisses on her blushed cheek, now covered in flour and dots of thick red pizza sauce from the spontaneous ingredient fight that had just sprung about. Sam spun around, grabbing hold of a bowl behind him already covered in sauce, and dipped his hand into the contents, covering his fingers and upper palm, ready to attack, but he stopped. Something about the way that she was looking at him, caused him to think twice before reacting the way he had planned. Her hands fell to her sides, fists balled up almost in a nervous gesture, lips parted in a somewhat desirable position and she was looking at him with…what was that? Lust? Sam looked at her overcome with an all familiar sensation, one he had felt for her for a very long time. Love. Want. Need. He glanced down at his hand, observing the thick red substance that was soaking his fingers, unsure of his next move and then it happened without warning…_

"I said, get…up. Now." The firm and demanding voice filled Sam's ears as his eyes snapped back open, falling back into reality. His body ached. His lips were dry and open, desperately wanting to move to form words, but nothing seemed to be working properly. He was suddenly aware of his partial nakedness as the rush of the wind overcame him, making him feel cold and even more frozen than he already was. How did he let things get this bad?

Sam slowly flipped his body over, the sting of the wet pavement against his bare bruised and wounded skin shot all over his body like a bolt of lightning, causing him to clench his teeth and whimper the first small sound he's managed to make since he woke up. The reality of his situation flooded his mind like a sinking ship and it was nobody's fault, but his own.

"Okay, here's the deal, I'm feeling generous despite the situation pretty boy, and the facts are that I have asked you not once, but twice, to get your pathetic, cheap ass off of the ground, right now, and you're still laying there like a little bitch. I'm giving you one last chance to pick yourself up, get off of my fucking driveway and never show your face anywhere around me or my wife again or I'm going to kill you next time, understand that?" The man standing over him stepped away, waiting once again, his shoe tapping against the pavement almost like the clock of death.

But oh, Sam understood alright. 100% clear.

Sam stood up uneasily, throwing out a few raspy coughs before limping away on his long walk home in his tightly snug undergarments and battle scars, left with nothing but the thoughts of his previous endeavors, constantly seeking things to fill the hole in his heart left by the things…and people…that he had left behind him in Ohio.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two.**

[Sometimes now, should mean later.]

* * *

**Knock knock**

Sam flipped over in bed with a groan. He must have fallen in bed and passed out. What time was it? He looked over across his bed and to the window on the wall. The sun was beaming through the pulled back white draped, casting long yellow rays of light onto his ruffled sheets over the empty spot of bed next to him. A smirk started to creep across his full pink lips, enveloping his face in a long lost smile that hadn't come around in a while.

_Sam looked over in bed and smirked as he dragged his fingertips down Mercedes' soft cheek that was illuminated by the sun coming in through the window causing her to light up in an uncontrolled smile that made his heart melt. He shook his head and sighed looking away, bringing a confused and concerned look to replace the smile that had graced Mercedes before._

_"What is it? Was I that bad? I told you I didn't know what I was doin', Sam, I just-" Sam laughed slyly at her reaction, quickly quieting her with his finger on her lips._

_"Baby...you were AMAZING. I'm just embarrassed." Sam blushed and bit his lip a little, knowing that was Mercedes' weakness. Mercedes' expression softened and she placed her hand on Sam's cheek to reassure him before replying._

_"Sam. It's okay...it was your first time, not everybody can last that long, I understand." Sam looked at her wide eyed and moved her hand and quickly responded._

_"What? No! Ugh, no, I just was trying to make a joke about how you make me feel all corny and stuff and win you over with my boy next door charm and smooth talking! I, you, uhh! Was it really that fast?" Mercedes burst into an uncontrollable laugh, thoroughly enjoying Sam's completely adorable reaction to her own joke that she had thrown out, successfully making his joke backfire. She smiled and shook her head, reassuring Sam that she was only joking and he relaxed into a lopsided grin, his head falling back down on the pillow in defeat. "You are so evil, Mercedes Jones. EVIL."_

_"I may be evil...but, I'm also-" She stopped mid sentence and looked away, quickly realizing what she was about to say._

_"You're also what?" Sam looked at her, grabbing her chin forcing her to look at him which he knew she hated. Mercedes did not like feeling weak or vulnerable. She was 100% diva and always wore the pants in every relationship in her life. No one could ever make her feel vulnerable, but with Sam, she felt different. It was new to Mercedes and in a way it scared her to have her heart on her sleeve like that, putting herself out there to potentially be hurt in a way she had always wanted to avoid. But, she also knew what she felt for Sam was real and was not going to go away._

_"I'm also...in love with you, Sam. I love you. There, you happy?" She looked away with a smile on her face that she couldn't contain and it grew bigger the minute she heard Sam mutter his response._

_"I love you, too."_

**Knock knock knock knock**

"Open up! I know you're in there and I need your rent. Now, Evans."

Sam rolled out of bed and quietly mimicked the voice to himself in an overly exaggerated way, repeating the word "Now" over and over in the best nasally voice he could muster. Now now now, that seemed to be all he heard lately. Do this, now. Now. Now. Sam studied the more he said now in his head, the more he started to think of the word cow, which in turn just made him realize how badly he desired a cheeseburger. The rumble in his stomach quickly reminded him that anything to eat would be sufficient. He hadn't eaten in what felt like days. He snapped out of the thought, when he heard a different rumbling at the door. His landlord was starting to unlock and open it when Sam sprinted to it, catching the door knob himself and twisting it open.

"Hey! Sorry...what's up?" Sam managed to choke out, trying not to embarrass himself with his excessive gasping and panting from his short sprint to the door.

His landlord stood before him, his dark and bushy eyebrow cocked in a disbelieving gesture before clearing his throat and crossing his arms.

"You know exactly "what's up", Evans. You owe me this month's and last month's rent. Now, I've been lenient with you more than I should and you know that."

Sam looked down at the ground for what seemed like several minutes, his heart beating out of his chest and a bead of sweat forming on his brow as he searched his mind for any solution to escape this sticky situation.

"I...uh...had the money. But, my mom is really sick, Bill." Word filler Sam, word filler, remember good lying involves detail! DETAILS! "Like...so sick that a person of her...stature uh and abilit-uh-disabilities really and honestly shouldn't be as sick as she is right now, because she well, the doctor that is, said that it could be bad and they needed money for the uh-surgery." Sam stood there almost dumbfounded at his new level of stupid that just flew out of his mouth.

"I need you out by the end of this week, Sam. I'm sorry." Sam watched as his landlord unfolded his arms, a disappointed look on his face as he quickly departed, undoubtedly to avoid further discussion.

Sam ran his fingers through his hair, releasing a heavy sigh to follow it as he closed his door in frustration behind him. Unable to even conjure enough strength to go any further, Sam leaned back against his door, letting his body slide all the way down it until his bottom hit the floor. He looked around his somewhat pitiful efficiency apartment. His clothes peppered the floor and covered what few pieces of furniture he had. He closed his eyes and pictured a time when the issues he had were what to wear the next day or what song to pick for Glee Club. Glee Club. It seemed like a distant memory now. Almost like a dream. A good dream that still flickered a fire in his heart, a shimmer of happiness that he once had.

Sam was 21 years old to the date and what a birthday this was turning out to be. After all of his friends had graduated, he was stuck having to go back home to Kentucky, no excuse for staying in Lima anymore for his senior year. Everyone was off succeeding and living their dream and Sam felt like his had been completely missed. Sam was smart...sometimes...well, at certain things maybe, but dropping out of high school wasn't one of his best ideas. His vision had been to work until he could earn enough money to make it out to LA and maybe find a job acting or singing somewhere like his friends. Instead he was stuck here in this dump with barely enough money to buy a pack of gum. Gum. That's what that woman at the bar was chewing last night obsessively that got caught in his hair when they were getting it on at her place. Also...not one of his best decisions. Should have definitely checked if she was married.

Sam's eyes darted open instantly at the buzz of his cell phone hidden under a pile of clothes next to him in the floor. He began to dig for it, finding it in the pocket of a worn out pair of jeans. He clenched it tightly, blinking a few times trying to make sure what he was seeing correctly. He answered the call and held the phone up to his ear.

"...H-Hello?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

[Don't tell me not to live, I've simply got to.]

* * *

A few hours away, a very spunky and overdriven Rachel Berry Hudson paces back and forth her Manhattan apartment, racking her brain, thinking of every little detail about what her manager had just told her as she hangs up her phone.

"Rachel, what did he say baby?" Finn asks her calmly as he rises to his feet off of the edge of the sofa in anticipation.

"M-my musical. It's..." She squeaks, an unsure and worrisome tone to her usually prideful voice.

"It's?" Finn cups his wife into his arms, hugging her close and placing a reassuring kiss on her forehead, damp with a little sweat from previous news.

"Sold out." She steps away from Finn, looking up at him with large eyes, a smile forming on her lips. "It's sold out, Finn. It's the opening night of MY musical and it's SOLD OUT!" She shouts in excitement before bouncing up and down like a kid opening their first gift on Christmas morning.

Finn looks at her in disbelief, recovering from the well played pity act that his wife just performed and transitions into excited. "WHAT?" He jumps up and down with her, resulting in what looks to be a scene out of a corny 80's movie, minus the shoulder pads. He embraces her, tears of joy forming in the bottom lids of his proud eyes, overflowing down his cheeks overcome with relief and happiness for his beautiful wife that has worked so hard for this amazing news.

Rachel smiles bigger, feeling like if she smiled any larger than what she was, her face would burst. She pushes away from Finn after planting a celebratory kiss on his tear soaked lips and immediately reaches for her phone and hurriedly starts scrolling through her contacts, browsing numbers.

"Who are ya gonna call first, babe? Your dads?" Rachel looks up at Finn after this question, her face twisted into a softer and much less happy expression. "What? What's wrong?" Rachel looked down at her phone, glancing at a name that she somehow had avoided seeing these past few years. A contact that she honestly had forgotten somehow...looked over, and honestly ignored.

"Finn...do you ever think about Sam? Wonder how he's doing?" Rachel flicks her watery brown eyes up at him waiting for a response, not caring the outcome. Just asking a very honest question, wondering what he will say.

"I..." Finn raises his hand to the back of his neck, rubbing at it, almost digging for something to say, guilt washing over him like every other time his mind wandered to Sam. "Sometimes. Yeah." He looked at his wife. Her once excited and enthusiastic mannerisms, washed into sadness and disappointment. Baby, it's okay." He once against scooped her small frame up into his giant comforting arms, knowing that usually comforts her. "Things happen and people change. They drift away and sometimes your best friends in high school, aren't around forever." Rachel pushed away and looked at him with a new look in her eyes.

"Sam is the only one we don't see or at least talk to anymore, Finn." Rachel turned away and paced to the back of the room, her hands on her face, then raking through her hair before turning around to face her husband again. "I want everyone to be here for my opening night. I reserved tickets for everyone. I've had them for a month now. I want to see him, don't you? Shouldn't I at least try and contact him? We haven't even done that."

"I dunno, Rach, do you really think that's a good idea? I mean Mercedes is one of your best friends and she lives right down the block so you know she'll be there and after what happened I mean..." Finn stopped and looked at her face. Full tears are now flowing down her flawless cheeks and over her parted and quivering lips, a look that Finn did now want to see ever, because it ripped his heart out every single time. "Rachel, please don't cry." He ran his thumb across her cheek, wiping away a falling tear on it's way down and placed a kiss on her lips, taking those tears with him. "Give him a call. But, from what I've heard of his current situations, I doubt that he'll answer."

A few minutes of waiting went by since Rachel scurried off to the bedroom to make her phone call to Sam. Voices could be heard from a far, so Finn could only assume that Sam did answer the phone. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Finn arose to his feet once again, and darted for the door, trying to avoid Rachel noticing in case of another crazed fan accident. He twisted the knob and opened the door, turning wide eyed at the face that he was not expecting or wanting to see at this particular moment in time.

"Hey, Finn! Where's Rachel? I heard the news and brought the bubbly!" Mercedes stood in the doorway, an open grin painted across her face, champagne filled hands at the ends of her stretched out arms.

"H-how did you know already? We just found out ourselves!" Finn blurted out, still standing in the doorway, leaving Mercedes in the hallway wondering why she hasn't been let in to sit her things down.

"Kurt, of course. He's a blabber mouth and in the show too, silly. Come on now, move before I make ya move boy!" Mercedes moved past Finn forcefully despite the warning and placed the bottles on the table and made her way to the kitchen, opening up cabinets searching for some champagne flukes. "RACHEL!" She called loudly, knowing she was somewhere in the house.

"Mercedes, shush! She's on the phone." Finn puts his fingers to his lips, motioning for the diva to calm down a little, terrified of the situation. Mercedes stopped her search, turning to Finn with a look of confusion.

"Who is she on the phone with, Finn. I know that look on your face and it's not just to warn me out of concern for her phone call privacy. Who is she talking to?" Mercedes had a way of getting anything out of anybody and Finn was starting to feel very uncomfortable knowing he was the easiest of the group to break.

* * *

Sam hung up the phone, breathing unsteady wondering if that phone call was just a figment of his imagination. Rachel had called to check on him and invite him to the opening night of her new musical. He had agreed, but how was he going to do that? He was completely broke, soon to be homeless (again), and a total deadbeat. He hadn't seen his friends since he was 17 years old, why four years later would he want to be seen in this state? Sure they had seen him homeless at 16, but that was his parents fault, not his. He had gone through some rough stuff the past few years, things that should have completely broken him, but yet here he was. An empty shell of his past self, sitting on the floor of a rundown apartment that technically wasn't even his anymore.

After a few minutes went by, he rose to his feet and started towards the bathroom. He flipped on the light and it flickered and turned on. His image in the dirty mirror wasn't one that he could easily recognize anymore. His hair was getting long again, blood stains still gracing parts of it and his cheek from his earlier run in. No wonder his landlord thought he was crazy. He was still handsome though. His eyes although darkened by his past, still sparkled in the light a soft green with a gentleness still there. His hair was darker now, but still a blonde hue like everyone else in his family. His lips still youthful and plump, trouty as they may be, the chicks still digged 'em. He lifted up his shirt, revealing some bruises, but still sporting a defined and toned abdomen and a strong chest. He let his shirt fall back down and scratched at the stubble on his face. If he was going to see everyone again, he was going to have to make himself look like something worth seeing, and he definitely needed to act like someone worth seeing.

"Sam Evans...it's time for a makeover." He switched off the light and exited the room.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

[I'm not on drugs, it's just an emergency.]

* * *

Sam stood banging on the front door of his parent's house, a place he had made a conscious effort not to visit very often. After being caught stripping and making a few drug deals for cash, his dad wasn't his biggest fan anymore and well, his mom just made herself a bed in his shadow. A very well known and missed face appeared in the door, the face of Sam's little sister Stacey as she smiled big at the sight of him, flinging the door open as fast as she could make it go.

"SAM!" She squealed as she flung her body on to his, almost knocking him over in one swift motion. Sam savored her hug, taking her in as he fought back the tears that were welling up in his eyes, missing being around to watch his siblings grow.

"Look at you, you're so big!" Sam smiled and planted a kiss on her head, giving her an extra squeeze before releasing her. "Where's mom?" Sam looked behind her, searching for any sign of movement in the house, not daring to go in yet without further permission.

"She's gone with dad for a jog. They just left a few minutes ago. Why? What are you doin' here anyway? You never come by anymore." Her mood darkened as she looked down, making a pattern with her foot in the gravel of the walkway. Sam frowned and lowered himself to a squat, grabbing her arms and then her hands, forcing her to look at him.

"I promise that I wanna be around more and I'll do my best to make that happen. But, I need your help right now, beautiful. Can you help me?" The girl nodded and smirked a little, reassuring him to continue. "I need some money so that I can make it up to New York this weekend to see my friend Rachel in her new play. I know that's a lot to ask and I don't even know if you could help me, but I really need this. I need this to change. I can't go up there the way that I am now. Plus..." he trailed off, not even wanting to say the name that was in his head right now, knowing all the memories that it would bring back like it had been doing so often lately.

"Mercedes is gonna be there, isn't she?" Sam looked away, taking that sentence like a bullet to the chest. He slouched into a sitting position on the pavement and darted his eyes to the living room behind his sister that was partially visible behind the open door, forced to glance there because of the loudly ringing phone that resided on the end table closest to the doorway.

_"Answer it 'cedes! ANSWER IT! Now!" Sam smiled and shook his girlfriend in excitement, prompting her to slowly pick up the ringing phone on the table, unsure of the response that would await her on the other side. She gently placed the phone against her ear, mumbling a quick hello to begin the conversation._

_"Yes. Mmhmm. I...yeah. Sure, that will work. Uh huh, I understand. Okay. Thank you. Bye bye." She hung up the phone, a disappointed look on her face that quickly turned into a smile that she couldn't hold in much longer._

_"Oh shit...oh shit OH SHIT! YOU DID IT! Ahhh! You made it, you, oh my God!" Sam jumped up and down in a frenzy, grabbing Mercedes' hands and forcing her to jump with him before he broke out into dancing in the most embarrassing way that he could pull off and began making up a ridiculous celebratory song. "You mah-hayeddd it, you buh buh buh made it, YOU bah bah bah Mercedesssss freakinnnn Jonessssuh you...bah bah made it doo doo daaaah dah!" Mercedes busted out into continuous laughter at her ridiculous boyfriend acting like a crazy fool and then grabbed his arms and threw him on the couch, making him squeak in shock followed by an "Umph!". She mounted him and smiled down at him, enjoying this site much more than her life changing phone call that she had just received. Sam began to smile, looking up at this amazing woman, his amazing woman, that he not only admired, but loved so much that he could feel her emotions almost better than she could. She smiled bigger, dragging the tops of her fingers down his chubby and adorable cheek, not having to say any words. He winked at her, making her blush and then formed his lips to mouth "I love you."._

_Mercedes bent down, hovering above Sam's lips, making him suffer in anticipation before pressing her lips against his, making him feel warm all over like her kisses always did. He curled his toes and wrapped his arms around her, taking her bottom lip between his parted lips, sucking and biting on it, making her giggle a little and smile. She broke the kiss, leaning back to study his face. Full of youth and joy that gave him a very innocent and charming appeal, yet handsome and sexy that drove her wild with lust._

_"I love you, too, Sam. I thought you hated being corny?" She chuckled then bit her lip a little, looking into his eyes._

_"Yeah, well. I can't help it! I'm proud of you. You're gonna do so many amazing things and see all kinds of awesome places. I knew you could do it. You're the cream risin' to the top, remember?"_

"Remember? Sam? Hellooo?" Stacey stood in front of Sam with a look of confusion as she snapped her fingers in from of her dazed brother.

"W-what? Sorry, I zoned out." Sam shook his head and rubbed his face trying to force himself back into reality.

"Mom and dad have that credit card in the top drawer of the coffee table for emergencies, remember? Use it to get what you need then bring it back, okay? Don't make me regret this." Stacey held out the card for Sam to grab and he did, stuffing it into his wallet then back into his pocket for safe keeping. "Are you on drugs?" Sam looked at his sister and shoved her playfully.

"No, you dingbat. What kind of question is that?" Sam straightened himself out into a Forrest Gump like stance and mumbled a line in his best Gump voice to say "I'm not a smart man, but I don't do druh-gzz." Stacey giggled and pushed him away and he hugged her once last time before waving goodbye, headed back to his run down car to head for the city for his "emergency" supplies.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

[Leaving it all behind and starting new.]

* * *

_Sam looked up at his once happy and carefree girlfriend, now stricken with grief, tears rolling down her cheeks like an unstopping river. Tears that he knew he was mostly the cause of, no way to take them back and comforting her would only make it worse._

_"Mercedes...I-" Mercedes stopped him by simply holding a hand up. A hand that she after used to wipe away some tears, followed by a sniff and a long stare into the distance. The look on her face was enough to break his heart. He grabbed at his chest, feeling his beating heart almost as if he was checking to make sure it was still there. It was, and it was burning. All of this was his fault, from beginning to end, this whole situation was brought about by him and his dumb mistakes. A lump began to form in his throat, one that he couldn't swallow or get rid of no matter how hard he tried. Mercedes turned to look at him, a look of regret and discontent in her eyes._

_"Sam..." she trailed off, looking at the floor as if the words she was about to say were the hardest ones she's ever had to choke out. "This is all too much for me." her eyes darted up to her boyfriend. His face twisted with a somber expression, tears forming now in his eyes, his lip shaking not by his control. She looked down again, knowing if she looked at him she wouldn't be able to get out what she wanted to say. "What's done is done...there's no going back and I promise I'm not gonna be bitter or hateful even, but I can't just pretend like nothing ever happened and Sam...I'm moving to LA in a few days."_

_Sam's heart dropped. He looked around the room, his brain racing for answers, something to say, anything that could stop what she was saying, to turn back time, to make everything right again. He lunged at her, dropping to his knees, grabbing at her hands, then her legs when she wouldn't accept the gesture. "Baby, no, please...don't be like that, I promise I'll do anything I can to make it all better, to distract you, to take your mind off of all of this mess. I promise I can still make you happy, make you smile. Just..." Sam rested his finger beneath Mercedes' chin, making her turn towards him, to look at him. "Don't...don't leave me." Sam let a single tear fall down his cheek and to the ground, his heart now thumping in a painful pace, feeling like it was about to explode._

_Mercedes began crying again, full blown tears racing down her cheeks as she fought her urge to sob looking at him so humbled and desperate in front of her. She still loved Sam with all of her heart, but the future seemed so unclear now, so uncertain. Her once clear picture of them being together, now clouded by pain and bad memories. She raised her hand weakly to his cheek. Gently rubbing it before kissing him on the head briefly. She arose to her feet. Looking towards the door then back at Sam still kneeling on the floor, grabbing at his chest and hair nervously awaiting her response._

_"I love you, Sam. But...I can't be with you anymore."_

Sam shot up in bed, hot tears streaming down his face and onto his sheets. He felt his chest, his heart thumping wildly under his fingers, the words still playing clearly in his head. He tried to relax as he reached up and grabbed his hair with both hands, pulling it a little in frustration, slumping over as he began to sob. It had been 4 years since the love of his life had walked out on him and he had tried not to linger on the painful thoughts and feelings of emptiness he had felt from the past events and yet lately, it was all he could think about, all he could dream about, and all he could feel.

He still saw her from time to time in magazines that he passed while he was walking to work at the local gas station and from time to time when he would watch tv, he would see her on the news. She was famous now, a spectacular actress and performer. He had both albums that she had already put out and owned the movie that she starred in. In a way, it made him feel closer to her, being able to hear her voice and watch her act. Made him feel like he was right on the front row, supporting her like he had always promised he would be. It made him feel better until news would come out every once in awhile of who she was dating in Hollywood or interviews of her discussing her dating life. He desperately wished she would say his name, just to hear her say it one more time. He had heard that she had moved to New York, no doubt to be closer to their other friends that resided there, and suddenly he realized that he was the only one that wasn't. The only one that had ended up broke, a loser, and alone.

He had heard through the grape vine all of the successes of his former Glee Club buddies. Rachel and Finn getting married and living in a very nice flat that overlooked Manhattan. Rachel, a successful Broadway actress and Finn, an intern of one of the best producers in NYC. He was shocked, but happy to hear that his once partner in crime and somewhat bad boy friend Puck had rekindled his fire with Quinn Fabray and they both got out of Lima and never looked back. Quinn had graduated Yale with honors in Theater and was now performing in NYC as well and Puck, who tagged along with her, acting as her "manager" and now fiancée. He had also heard that Quinn got so far because her "manager" never took no for an answer and was also known to be a little pushy and somewhat "bad ass". As far as the asian couple, Tina and Mike, they were happily married of course and the last he heard, they had a baby on the way. They were dancers in New York as well, Tina now on leave for her pregnancy. Santana and Brittany had a similar story, partners in crime and dancers for Rachel's show, as said by Rachel on her long phone conversation to Sam, also letting him know that Kurt and Blaine were still together and in her show as well. And Artie, another friend that Sam dearly missed and couldn't wait to see had found someone as well and was working as a director in Hollywood and New York City.

But, what did that say of Sam? He was happy for his friends, but he felt so lost. So disconnected. Everyone had been so successful and it felt as if he could never catch a break. He threw his covers to the side and swung his legs over and his feet rested against the cold wooden floor. He looked up and across the room to his mirror hanging on the wall. He could see himself and for a moment, he had to blink his eyes, forgetting that he had performed his makeover yesterday. He had gotten his hair trimmed to a much more age appropriate length and style. It was a handsome cut, but still youthful and attractive. He had the hairdresser run some highlights through his hair, brightening it up to a more old Sam look. He shaved and bought some new clothes, enough to stay a week in New York and at least put on a front to his friends that he was better off than they assumed he was. He wanted to shock everybody, surprise them like the news he had received about them had impressed him. He wanted them to see Sam as the boy that they remembered him to be, not the man that he had become.

He got up and showered and dressed before throwing all of his belongings into his suitcase, not even caring to leave his few pieces of furniture behind and his crappy job. He walked over to the counter, grabbing his keys and what little money he had to get gas in his car. He had returned his parents credit card after getting some extra money off of it for food while he was gone. He felt bad, but he would pay them back somehow. This was the start of a new life for Sam. A new beginning. He was going to get his life back, his friends back, and his girl back. Somehow.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

[False advertising is never the way to go.]

* * *

"One and a two and three and...Kurt...what are you-" Rachel snapped at her long time friend and partner in crime, Kurt Hummel, who was looking to the side every few seconds, causing him to stray from his concentration on his dance moves.

"Don't put Blaine in front of me if you expect me to concentrate on anything other than his vurry fine bee-hind!" Kurt quipped with a face of accomplishment, smirking at his now blushing boyfriend. Rachel tried to dismiss everything with a forced smirk, but her impatience bubbled out into her true feelings.

"Please Kurt, can we focus a little more? I am already to my absolute limit-so let's remember what we are all here for and be ready for our opening show this weekend, shall we?" She remarked in reply, her hands stiffly expressing her every word then folding to cross her arms in conclusion. "We have all worked so so hard on this production. I just wanted to end practice today by letting you all know how happy I am that you're all here to enjoy this moment and share it with me. Mike, you've done an amazing job choreographing everything, and all of you have really inspired me to write what I think is an amazing show."

"Leave it to Berry to always throw herself in her own thank you speeches." Remarked Santana, with a joking smile forming on her lips, winking at Rachel to show she was just messing around. But, her usual undertone of truth was still hinted. Brittany looked to Rachel then Santana, a confused expression on her face.

"I thought she wasn't a Berry anymore?" Santana looked at Brittany after her statement and kissed her on her hand that she was clasping at her side and winked at her, knowing the pointlessness of responding.

Rachel ignoring both statements, cleared her throat then proceeded with the rest of what she wanted to say, no one surprised that she wasn't finished just yet. "I have some news, guys. I talked to Sam a few days ago." Everyone's expressions turned into ones of shock as they talked amongst themselves then were quickly interrupted. "He's going to come in to see the show. And he's actually on his way now. I told him that I would come to meet him uptown for a bite to eat before showing him to my and Finn's flat. I thought it might be a good idea if you all would come with me? I mean I'm sure he would be happy to see everyone."

They all looked at eachother, absorbing everything they had just heard. A few nods and shrugs were exchanged, smiles beginning to form on their faces.

"Let's go get him." chanted Mike, looking to Rachel with a grin.

* * *

Sam gripped the steering wheel as he approached closer and closer to his destination, noting the big buildings off in the distance. It had been several years since he had seen the city. Seemed like a lifetime since he had stood out in the center of New York City, dancing and signing with his friends. Sharing it all with the girl that he had just formed the beginning of an amazing relationship with during that very trip. He began to drift into memories again, remembering the discussion that they had shared, one that he often thought about and went back to just to feel like he was in that moment again.

"Get yourself together, Sam. She is gonna see you and then realize how much she loves you and come back." Sam muttered to himself, checking himself out in the rear view mirror every few seconds, confirming to himself that he looked the part. He missed his friends and seeing them was really going to make him happy, but honestly if he had to leave here empty handed without her, he didn't really know what he was going to do. His mind began to wander, thinking back to details of his phone conversation with Rachel, not really recalling her saying anything about Mercedes. He wandered if she would even be there, especially if she knew he was coming. Surely she wouldn't miss Rachel's show, but after all that had happened, he started to feel very somber. She could always catch Rachel's show another time. She was a busy woman anyway. Why would she take time to see him when all it was probably going to do is depress her? He started to feel frustrated, despite knowing that he was just conjuring all of these things in his head, he started to feel an overwhelming sense of truth in all of these possibilities. Maybe he should just turn back. It was a stupid idea anyway thinking that everyone would be fooled by a makeover and petty little lies after all that they've probably heard about him. Heck, they probably just felt sorry for him anyway. Who didn't?

**SMACK**

Sam sat there, wide-eyed and breathing hard as smoke billowed from the front of his car. All of this negative thinking forming into a lack of awareness and paying attention to where he was going.

"Shit." He dropped his hands that were still frozen on the wheel and dropped them on his lap, keeping them there for a few seconds before running them through his hair...and pulling...hard. He had ran into another car. Right into the back bumper. Talk about epic bumper cars fail. He knew he should get out, call the police even, yet he did neither. He just sat there, slumped down, his face in his hands, and his heart beating fast as he thought about what he was gonna do with no money, no insurance, and no one really to help. He jumped really quickly when he heard a knock on his window. When he uncovered his face and looked over, his heart dropped.

Mercedes stood there, her angry expression morphing into one of almost fear when she realized who was in the driver's seat. She stood there frozen, her eyes wide and confused as she began to back up away from the car door, looking to her car as if debating to just get in and drive away. He grabbed at the door handle, his fingers slipping from nerves. He finally forced the door open and halfway jogged to reach her, grabbing her arm before she yanked it away. She studied his face, the look of confusion continuing to grow by the second. Sam could tell she was searching for answers, searching for words.

"W-what...how? What are you doing here?" She finally choked out, her lip slightly shaking. He could tell from her excessive blinking that she was trying to wake up, wondering if she was standing in a dream. Sam's eyes darted around, panicking and at a loss for words. Obviously Rachel had not told her that he was coming and his first thoughts to tell her the truth began to seem more and more like a bad idea. What if she wasn't even invited to the show? She might get angry or sad. What if Rachel didn't want her to know that he was here? She might get mad at Rachel. And he didn't want to seem like some country hick loser that hadn't seen the lights of New York City since he was a teenager and only hauled up here because his friends begged him to. So...he decided to go with a different route. Not his best idea ever.

"I-i'm actually moving here. Yeah. Scoping the city out for a place. I am going into singing now, working on my new album. See, I borrowed a car from a buddy of mine, piece of junk actually. I was afraid to take my new car into town. It's a lambo. Brand new, white." He scratched the back of his neck, almost hard enough to make him wince, wanting to kick himself for that load of crap that he just spewed. What was he thinking?

Mercedes still looking at him completely shocked and confused, looked him up and down and crossed her arms. He looked good to her. Better than she remembered him before. Sam was always very attractive and a guy that the ladies never struggled to swoon over and honestly, she always had, too. She wasn't the type of girl that wanted everyone to know when she would find a guy attractive, she took that as a sign of weakness. She didn't swoon, she quietly "browsed", never letting herself be placed on a level lower than any man. But when she was thinking to herself, without showing any sign of her thoughts, she wanted to melt onto the ground. It had been a long time since she had seen this man standing in front of her, at the time merely a boy, now grown into a handsome and sexy being. She noted the hint of scruff that now graced his face, slightly rugged and appealing. His hair, blonde like she remembered it, but cut in a way that was age appropriate, but still tuggable. Those lips...juicy and kissable, one of her favorite features that he possessed, her teeth clenching in a way that she had long forgotten, begging to nibble on them. He was dressed very nicely. Gray lined dress slacks and a dark blue button up, tucked into them nicely, hugging his body just enough to hint at his flawless features that resided on his abdomen. His shirt was unbuttoned a few holes down at the top, showing off his impeccable chest that lived underneath. Now that her initial feeling of shock had passed, her focus on the breathtaking specimen in front of her was too consuming for her to handle and honestly she wished that he had looked terrible instead.

"Guess it was a good call bringing a piece of crap car then, huh?" Mercedes looked over at her car, bumper hanging onto the car just barely. Sam immediately started to feel worse than he had before, realizing the reality of the situation. "It's okay. It'll get fixed." She bit her lip, looking anywhere but at Sam and put a hand on her hip. "You're a singer now? I had no idea that you were wanting to pursue that."

Sam shrugged his shoulders and looked down at his feet. "You know that I love it. I just never thought I could catch a break...ya know like, well like you did." Mercedes looked over at him. Her lips parted in a softer expression. She crossed her arms and looked away again, almost like she was trying to fight tears.

"I wouldn't have gotten where I was without your help, Sam. Don't think that I have forgotten that." Sam began to talk, but stopped when Mercedes continued, her eyes dead on his. "You're good, Sam. You've always had the talent. Glad you caught your break." Mercedes turned away and walked to her car, feeling tears start to well up again and began to open her door before feeling a hand on her wrist.

"You...believe in me? Still?" He managed to ask, his hand clasped around her wrist, afraid to let go. Mercedes turned to look at him, her eyes searching his.

"It's not important who believes in you, Sam. It's havin' the strength to start believin' in yourself." Sam let go of her, his arm falling limp to his side as he watched her get into her car and shut the door before rolling down her window. "Take your friend's car down to the small auto shop down the road. They'll take care of it for you. See ya Sam..." Sam couldn't muster the strength to respond, his mouth dry and his throat scratchy from fighting tears. "Oh and Sam. You should go see everyone...they would love to see you... Good luck with your album."

Sam stood in the middle of the street as he watched her drive away. A familiar feeling and something he wasn't expecting to see again. His heartbeat quickened, everything just now sinking in, the question formed in his head as he swallowed hard. What had he started?


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

[Catching up on the good and the bad.]

* * *

Back in his now damaged car, Sam once again began driving down the road, reflecting on the things that had just happened. What a small world that out of everyone who lives in New York, she was the one he ran in to. Literally. He knew he had no money to fix his car, but oddly enough, that was the last thing that was on his mind. He knew it had to be fate that he ran into her, but why did he have to lie? Nothing good can ever come from a lie. His previous endeavors were always to tell the truth, to be the best person he could be. That was the foundation that he had always stood so firmly on so, why was it all of a sudden crumbling just to compete with the only people in his life that he had always trusted to support him and love him no matter what? If he told the truth now, he wondered if anyone would even trust him. They would probably find him to be even more pathetic and pitiful than before. Maybe now being a better person meant building this imaginary life for himself. No one had to know the truth, he rationalized in his head. He would just live out the week, pretending to be successful as they were, pretend to decide not to want to live in New York, and head back home. Maybe Mercedes would realize that she still loves him and give him a call. Slim chance...but, it's all the hope he had left.

He must have sat outside of that restaurant for at least 30 minutes. He had began to count the bricks on the building, trying to distract himself from the nerves that were welling up inside of him. He hadn't seen his friends in 4 years and now, not only did he have to worry about it being awkward, but he had to try and remember all of the lies he had started and try to work up enough strength the follow through with them and them believing him. He glanced over at the clock. He was late, of course. They were all sitting in there wondering if he was even gonna show probably and he still sat there, battling his mind to get out of the car or just turn around and drive home. He looked over and saw a car pull up, he didn't know how he knew, but somehow he had the feeling it was going to be someone he would recognize.

Out of the car exited his two old friends, Santana Lopez and Brittany S. Pierce. He smirked as he observed them closely, reminiscing on their times spent together at Mckinley, a warm feeling washing over him as he began to build up more courage to face them. Santana was rustling around in the back seat and he could see another small head back there. Did they have a kid? He squinted as he saw Santana help the child out of the car and she grabbed a bag and a small jacket from the backseat in which she had the kid pull on over their arms. It was a girl, a very cute and pretty girl. She had black hair that was pulled into piggy tails on either side of her head and darker skin like Santana's. From a distance, he could only guess that Santana might have been the true mother of the child and that they had just purchased a donor. She looked around 2 or 3 years old and was smiling, grabbing onto her mother's hand. He was happy for them, but sad at the same time. He pondered on how if he and Mercedes had stayed together, they could have been able to share the same thing with one another. Have a family, be happy. He snapped out of his thoughts when he glanced down at his phone that was buzzing loudly in his pocket. He grabbed it and opened his text messages, a new one from Rachel asking where he was. He sighed and slipped the phone back in his pocket and opened his door to enter in. It was now or never he guessed.

* * *

"Oh my gosh, where is he?" Rachel blurted out as she began to text Sam, frustrated with how long they've had to wait.

"Rachel, give him a break, the traffic here probably isn't what he's used to in Kentucky. It might take him awhile to get here. It's not like we have much to do tonight, be cool and relax." Finn rubbed his wife's back, trying to get her to chill out and not bug Sam with a handful of text messages. "You hate texting and driving anyways, do you want to make him wreck?" Rachel shot her husband a glare, causing him to sink down into the booth, regretting even opening his mouth.

Everyone looked up and smiled as Santana and Brittany walked up, taking a seat on the outside of the booth. "Sorry guys, that took longer than we thought it would. Had to talk to Zoey's sitter about some extra hours for this weekend." Santana sat her up in a high chair and smirked at the others after picking up a menu.

"Where's Sam at?" Asked Brittany after looking around. "Is that what we're here for?"

"Yes, Britt, I'm sure he's on his way, now look at the menu. Do you know what you want or do you wanna split something like last time?" Santana held up a menu for Brittany and kissed her on the cheek.

"Oh..." Chirped Kurt as his lifted up a little looking towards the door making everyone look where he was looking. They all watched as Sam entered the building, looking around for them and they all raised their hands, ushering him to come closer. "He...looks good." Kurt looked around at everybody then grunted after getting elbowed by a slightly jealous Blaine.

Everyone rose to their feet, all exiting the booth to hug Sam, excited to see him after so long. Sam smiled for the first time in what felt like a long time as he hugged each of his friends, taking in this moment like it was gonna be the last.

"Sam, you look so good! How have you been?" Asked a very pregnant Tina, her face stretched in a vibrant smile as Mike placed his arm around her shoulder after shaking Sam's hand.

Sam couldn't stop smiling long enough to gather his thoughts initially, but after a few seconds he started to feel sick. He wanted to just sit there with them and not even talk about him. He wanted to hear about everything they had been into and what they had been doing, how they were doing and their future plans. He had also noticed that Everyone was there except for Mercedes, of course. He wanted to see her face again, to see her actually look at him and smile like everyone else was at the present moment. He missed making her smile and making her laugh. "I'm doing great, actually. Well, I had a little accident earlier-" he looked immediately to Rachel who squeaked in terror, her hands flying to her mouth.

"Was it because of my text?" Sam couldn't help but smirk at her reaction.

"No no, it was my fault. I kinda zoned out and rear ended Mercedes." Sam stopped smirking when everyone looked around the table at eachother wide-eyed in shock. Finn cleared his throat then looked at Sam with a confused expression on his face.

"You saw Mercedes?" Sam looked around then back at his friends and nodded.

"Yeah. It was a strange coincidence that she just happened to be in front of me. But, everything's okay. I was in my friend's car and it's kinda junky anyways so, it's not really a big deal." Sam desperately searched for a way to change the subject, not wanting to go into too much detail at the moment. He looked down at the little girl in front of him and smiled. This was the first kid of all of his friends to have and for a moment he felt overcome with guilt that it had took him this long to meet her. She was beautiful and he noted that she had hazel-green eyes that complimented her tan skin tone and he laughed lightly when she smiled big at him. "Is this your all's daughter?" He asked Santana and Brittany and Santana looked to her friends then back and him and nodded with a smirk. He noted the underlying expression on her face. She seemed slightly sad, upset that he was even having to ask the question and he understood her motives.

"Her name is Zoey." Santana looked to her daughter with a smile then to Brittany to exchange a smile with her.

Sam crouched down, studying Zoey's face and smiled. She seemed familiar, in the way that he assumed all of his friend's children would look. "She's beautiful." He muttered. Looking from Zoey to Tina's belly, more waves of guilt and sadness washed over him. He had missed so much in their lives and all they had really missed was him screwing up his own.

"Come on Sam, have a seat. Tell us what you've been into." Blaine broke the silence, motioning for Sam to take a seat. Sam swallowed hard and slide into the booth, dreading the conversation ahead.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

[Her biggest regret]

* * *

Mercedes had sat in the parking lot of the studio for an hour now. Her head resting against the steering wheel, her hands still gripping it tightly. What in the world was going on? She had been just living her life happily and distracted and she'd admit, from time to time, Sam would cross her mind and she would linger on thoughts of him for a few minutes, not long enough to depress her, but just momentarily wondering how he was doing. It was a strange coincidence that he had found his way back into her life at such a random moment and in such an odd way. It caught her so off guard that she had lost her cool. She played it well in front of Sam, trying not to let him know how much seeing him even for that short period of time effected her so deeply. She had thought about calling Rachel or Kurt just to blow off some steam, rant about the crazy event that had just happened, but she honestly didn't even know what she would say. She played the scene in her head, imagining that she would spill the beans on what just happened then merely stop there? They would probably ask her if she was okay or how she felt. She honestly didn't even know how she felt, but whatever these feelings were, they weren't ones that she enjoyed to feel.

"Ughh..." She groaned as she slowly let go of the steering wheel, her blood rushing back into her fingers that had turned white and numb from gripping the wheel for so long and so hard. For a moment she tried to cry, hoping that it would make her feel better or at least make her feel something that she understood, but nothing came out. This made her even more frustrated. She had worked so hard these past few years building up her very successful career, trying so hard to fill hat empty space that she had left behind. She was happy...at least, most of the time she felt like she was. She tried to block out her past and all of the memories associated with it. Well, all of the memories associated with him.

Sam was her first love and the only man she had ever loved. There were hundreds of wonderful memories that she had shared with him, but the one terrible one, the one that had shattered her heart into a million pieces was the one that burned a hole so deep in her heart that it made all of the good and happy memories fade away into a place in her soul that she never wanted to explore. She tried to fight off the sensation of revisiting the painful experience. It was a hovering thought that always tried to poke at her, to get her to revisit it. She usually was so good at pushing it away, but after seeing Sam, her mind was not going to spare her this time.

_Mercedes stood in front of her boyfriend. Nervous and holding her hands in front of her, balled up into shaking frenzy as she looked up to meet his gaze with hers. He was tense, and she could tell he was trying to speak, his lips parting and closing several times as if he didn't know how to string words together. He raised a hand over his mouth, then up through his hair before responding audibly._

_"Are...are you sure?" Is all he could spit out, his voice cracking at the end and fading out. Mercedes stepped closer to him, reached for his arm and held his wrist as she placed a soft kiss on his now shaking hand._

_"I'm sure. It's been a week now since my first test. I took several more after just in case...and I have all of the symptoms, Sam." Mercedes tried to hold herself together, fighting the urge to cry. She knew how hard this would be on both of them to raise a kid at their age and in their position. Sam was still in high school and she had just received a recording contract and was going to be off to LA soon to get started. They weren't even sure how they were going to handle being apart from eachother for however long it took for her to get her career started, but now this complicated things even more. Sam looked at Mercedes, trying so hard to find the right things to say or know what to do. He wanted to tell her that everything was gonna be okay and that everything was going to work out, but he didn't know what was going to happen. "Listen...you don't have to worry about this, we will find a way to make this work. I'll just call up my manager and tell him that I can't come to LA right now and maybe some time later on down the line, I can find my big break again and take the opportunity when we're ready for it." Mercedes could hear herself saying those words and was shocked at how calm she sounded when inside it was killing her to say them. She knew deep down if she didn't go now, she would never catch the same opportunity again. There's no way they would have time for all of that trying to raise a child at the same time._

_Sam looked at her, shock in his eyes and he searched her face. He started to feel something besides shock now, it was a little anger. She had worked so hard to get this chance and he couldn't bare to think of her throwing it all away. He wouldn't let her. "Get rid of it." He got out the words, but started to regret them. He wasn't really sounding like himself and it scared him, but he couldn't help himself._

_"W-what?" Mercedes looked at him, tears beginning to feel her eyes shocked at his statement._

_"Get rid of it, please. I want you to. You know we can't do this and you can't give up on your dreams. Not like this. I mean...later on down the road, when we're ready, we'll try again." Sam frowned when Mercedes snapped her hand away from his, a look of disappointment in her eyes. She couldn't believe what he was asking her to do or how she was even going to respond to it._

_"That's really what you want?" She asked, her voice shaking as tears began to stream down her face. Sam embraced her, kissing her cheek and trying to comfort her even though he knew it was all his fault she was feeling this way anyway. All Sam could do was nod, knowing there was no way he could actually mutter the word "Yes." to a question like that. Mercedes stood there with her mind racing, pondering her options and making a decision._

_"Okay, I'll do it. For you." She looked over at Sam, knowing those words and what she was about to do would probably be one of the biggest regrets she would ever have._


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

[Time for a change.]

* * *

Sam found himself unloading his belongings in the guest room at Rachel and Finn Hudson's place. They wouldn't let him stay at a hotel and that was definitely fine with him. He looked around at all of the perfectly placed items in the room. This was definitely a really nice set up they had and Rachel was obviously the one that decorated. He looked to the vanity that was at the front of the room, right beside the door, and noticed the pictures that were propped up against the mirror. He walked over to them and started picking them up, one by one, looking at the many different and familiar faces and events. He parted his lips then closed them quickly into a clenching seal of grief looking at pictures from Finn and Rachel's wedding, pictures of Zoey with Santana and Brittany when she was little, group pictures of everyone, and then there were the pictures of her. He stared at the last picture that was occupying the empty space on the surface of the marble vanity, a picture of himself and Mercedes the Summer after his Junior year. Right before she left. He rubbed his thumb over the picture, clearing the small layer of dust that had formed against the glass surface, a perfect metaphor he thought for their relationship.

"How's it goin', buddy?" Sam jumped at the abrupt voice, not expecting it in his own little world and looked over at Finn standing in the doorway and he smirked and gave a nod. "Sorry dude, didn't mean to scare ya." Finn put on a goofy lopsided grin and then looked over at the pictures and sighed. "Crap, I'm so sorry, man, we didn't really think about those being in here." Finn walked over and started to take the picture that Sam had been fixated on and he reached over and stopped his arm.

"No...it's okay. It doesn't bother me." Sam looked at it again then back at his friend, giving him a reassuring smile letting him know that he would be just fine. "All in the past, I guess...and after all, that was the best time of my life. It's something I always want to remember." Sam chewed on his bottom lip a little, then turned away to start folding his clothes again.

"But, hey, this is a great time too, right? Mr. Big Shot!" Finn grinned ear to ear and grabbed Sam's shoulders, shaking him back and forth making Sam fight to stay on his feet. He forgot how strong Finn could be...umph...he may have just scrambled his brains a little. Sam smirked back at Finn, trying to fight the sick feeling in his stomach knowing that what Finn was discussing was from his speech of lies he fed them earlier that day. "Dude, why did you pack so much stuff? You're only stayin' for the week, right?" Sam's heart dropped. He hadn't really thought about how bad it looked that he had packed up his whole apartment, knowing he wasn't going back there. He quickly shut his suitcase and smiled at Finn.

"Ha ha ha. I dunno, I just don't like to pack lightly. You never know what's gonna happen!" Sam shrugged it off and walked past Finn and into the living room leaving Finn in a confused daze.

"You expecting the end of the world?" Finn yelled after him, exiting the room as well.

* * *

"Where you goin', baby?" Growled a deep voice behind Mercedes and she looked up in the mirror, trying on different pieces of jewelry, not really sure what she wanted to wear with her new outfit.

"Out with friends, I told you that." She turned to look at her boyfriend and managed to make a sweet smile at him before turning back around to keep searching.

"You go out all the time, babe. Stay here with me tonight..." His big dark arms stretched around her, pulling her close to him so that her behind was right up against something that she definitely did not want to think about right now. He moved his lips close to her ear so that he could whisper into it. "We could have some..you and me time, yeah?" He kissed her ear and she shuttered.

Mercedes was not the kind of woman to date a guy just to have someone, but lately, she just wasn't very into Terrance. Her mind had just been somewhere else, somewhere in her past. Every guy that she had dated the past few years, was just not doing anything for her. She was always initially into them, but they never really made her feel that...spark. That fireworks feeling that you're supposed to feel when you're with somebody that you can't get enough of, that you wanna be around all the time. Like, Sam...

She shook the thought from her mind, trying not to think about something that made her so sad. But, it was hard to fight thinking about him, especially lately. Now that she's seen him. She looked at her phone, expecting to see a text from Rachel. She hadn't heard from her today and it seemed weird. She wondered if she even knew that Sam was in town. She had wanted to call her when she ran into him, but she was too scared to even say it out loud.

"I already made these plans, Terrance. My good friends are coming back in town from vacation and I haven't seen them in a long time. We'll spend some time together some time soon, okay?" Mercedes finished getting dressed then threw all of her makeup into her bag and headed for the door. She reached for the doorknob and got yanked back when he reached for her arm and grabbed it tightly.

"I'm tired of you makin' all the calls, Mercedes. You're gonna stay here with me, am I clear?" He spat, anger starting to rage in his eyes. Mercedes yanked her arm away, looking at him in shock. No man had ever treated her this way and she definitely wasn't gonna let it happen now. She walked closer to him, taking him by surprise, and spat in his face.

"No man...will ever grab me or talk to me in that way. Do I make _myself _clear?" Terrance slowly wiped his face, his expression twisted into one even angrier than before.

"You're gonna wish you'd never done that." He grunted, walking closer to her. Mercedes glanced to her phone, laying just outside of her tipped over purse that she had dropped too far out of reach. She usually never felt in danger, she could always take care of herself, but she was starting to feel fear at the pit of her stomach. How was she going to get out of this?

* * *

Rachel poked her head out of the kitchen and glanced at Finn and Sam who were sitting on the couch watching TV with plates of food in their hands. "How is it, boys?" She asked excitedly, a big smile planted on her face.

Sam and Finn looked at eachother then back at Rachel, full mouths and thumbs up as they nodded that he was really good. She jumped and squeaked in excitement as she clapped her hands together, pleased with herself. "Oh, yay! I'm so glad. I don't eat meat so I wasn't sure how well I could make it, but I can! I knew I could do anything. Rachel Berry Hudson, **you**are the woman!" She giggled before running back into the kitchen fully to fix her dinner. As soon as she exited the room, both men spit their food out on the plate and made faces of disgust.

"Dude, I'm sorry. This tastes like burnt fritos fried in gasoline." Sam coughed and tried to scrape his tongue with his fork before kicking back some of his soda. Finn laughed and grabbed at his stomach, frustrated that he couldn't laugh any louder or she would hear.

"Hahaha, man, that's a really good description. Poor Rachel, I love her, but she's not the best cook. She can make really good vegan stuff though...I mean if you like vegan food, I guess." Finn shrugged and chugged his soda.

"I heard Rachel say earlier that Puck and Quinn were back in town. Where did they go?" Sam put his plate down on the table in front of him, his stomach churning at the thought of another bite of that.

"Ah, they eloped a few nights ago and went out on a spontaneous honeymoon to Oklahoma." Finn smiled at Sam's reaction to the statement, knowing what the next question would be.

"Oklahoma? What in the world possessed them to go there for anything, let alone a honeymoon?" Sam asked completely confused.

"Puck said they had a really good play." Finn waited for the answer to sink in with Sam, then started laughing when Sam understood it. They both laughed for a few minutes, falling back against the couch, tears forming from laughter. Sam hadn't laughed this much in ages and he needed to so bad, it really didn't even matter how funny the subject really even was. He just couldn't stop. He looked over at Finn and smiled as he began to calm down.

"I miss this. I miss you guys." He mumbled. Finn didn't need to really say anything, he just smiled at his friend and grabbed his shoulder, squeezing it.

"We miss you, too."


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you all SO much for the reviews, I appreciate every **

**single one of them and they each inspire me to continue on. **

**Hope you enjoy this chapter ;-)  
**

* * *

**Chapter 10**

[For the first time]

* * *

_"Hey, do you know how much I love you?" Sam breathlessly asked after running over to stand on a boulder that was jutting out of the cliff, he quickly grabbed for a tree branch to balance himself, laughing a little at his lack of balance. He looked over at Mercedes, the cool night air was making her hair blow around her face, causing her to brush it away and he could tell she was trying not to blush. She couldn't stand to admit she liked how sweet he was to her._

_"Boy, you are crazy." She laughed off the comment and bit at her lip a little, her eyes watching him trying to stay perfectly balanced on the side of a cliff, but failing miserably. "You are gonna fall and kill yourself, get down!"_

_"You didn't answer my question." He beamed with his finger pointing straight to her, wagging it in an attempt to be persistent. Mercedes looked away for a minute and sighed. No one had really made her feel this way. She was almost frustrated at how much she liked his corniness, his charm, and his boyish demeanor. He definitely wasn't initially what she had thought to be her type, but they had somehow fallen in love and she knew it was impossible to go back._

_She looked back at Sam, her eyes smiling with her lips. "Yes, Sam." She rose to her feet and began to approach him as he hopped down from the rock. She met him in the middle between their starting points and slowly looked up into his eyes, making sure he knew she was being serious and sincere. "Do you know how much I love you?" _

_Sam swallowed hard...she looked so sexy right now, so fierce. His heart burned with lust and desire as it pounded away. She had no idea what she was doing to him, but at this rate he was sure she would find out soon. "H-how much?" he whispered, his lips staying parted after his question._

_Mercedes lifted her arms, her hands resting on his chest and then gripping his denim jacket as she pulled him down closer to her, her lips just barely resting on his, sending a spark down his spine and igniting a tingling sensation all throughout his body. Sam closed his eyes, breathing harder trying to control himself. Mercedes had never taken the first move before and honestly they had never done anything up to this point besides kiss. He started to press his lips against hers harder, but she pulled away. Sam's heart dropped, afraid that he had done something wrong._

_"Let's go back to my house. Mom and dad are away on vacation, remember?" Mercedes backed away smiling before she turned around to walk to the car. She knew she was being such a tease. But, after all, what's the fun being anything less?_

Sam woke up, his eyes darting to the window directly next to his bed. The lights from outside were streaming in through the window, so bright that it almost could pass for daylight. He almost forgot where he was for a second, then remembered when he heard loud honking out in the streets. He had been dreaming about her again, revisiting memories from his past. Their past. He didn't know why he had been having such vivid dreams lately, but they felt so real that it was hard to separate his dreaming from reality. He was having these flashbacks so often now that when he woke up, he felt like he needed to go back to sleep to be where he needed to be. He fell back on the bed, his head hitting the pillow as he squirmed around trying to get comfortable. Unfortunately he had a situation...one that he had most often when he woke up. One that...most men have when they wake up. He sighed, his hand running down his body to adjust himself. He felt his fingers graze up against his erection, making his lips part in a small gasp. He hadn't touched himself or been touched for that matter in awhile and he was starting to reap the consequences. His dreams of Mercedes didn't help either. He closed his eyes, taking himself back to where he left off.

_After arriving at Mercedes' house, the two lovebirds started to get uncomfortable with hunger. They had had so much fun spending the day together that they hadn't really had a change to eat much. Sam hit up the kitchen as soon as he walked in the door, beginning his search for any kind of edible substance. _

_"Oh, 'cedes...this looks DELISH." He held up a jar of pickled ham and pretended to sniff it like a good glue. Mercedes shook her head and made an uncomfortable face as she pretended to puke._

_"Okay, you're nasty. I don't think I wanna kiss you anymore!" Mercedes took the jar from his hands, tossing it directly into the trash behind him. Sam smirked and looked through the cabinets in front of him, pulling out some cans of pizza sauce. _

_"Hey, do you wanna make some pizza?" He asked turning to look at her. She smiled and opened the fridge, pulling out some cheese and flour then sat them on the counter with some bowls._

_"Sounds like a good idea." She smiled and planted a small kiss on Sam's cheek. She looked deep into his eyes distracting him long enough to reach behind him, grabbing the bag of flour. "You know...you look really sexy tonight..." she whispered, causing him to blush and bite his lip. "But, you know...there is something that's missing." She reached in the bag and grabbed a handful of flour then pulled back to throw it in his face._

_"Oh...my... GOD!" Sam laughed and wiped his face directly after, coughing and spitting out flour and watched as it dusted the floor. "You are so going to pay for that..." He opened the jar of sauce and dumped it into a bowl, getting it on his fingers and dragging them across her face. They both began to giggle and laugh uncontrollably as they covered themselves in the white powder and sauce, making it snow in the Jones' kitchen in the middle of June. Sam caught Mercedes from behind as she began to run away, wrapping his arms around her and laughing, planting kisses on her blushed cheek, now covered in flour and dots of thick red pizza sauce from the spontaneous ingredient fight that had just sprung about. Sam spun around, grabbing hold of the bowl behind him already covered in sauce, and dipped his hand into the contents, covering his fingers and upper palm, ready to attack, but he stopped. Something about the way that she was looking at him, caused him to think twice before reacting the way he had planned. Her hands fell to her sides, fists balled up almost in a nervous gesture, lips parted in a somewhat desirable position and she was looking at him with…what was that? Lust? Sam looked at her overcome with an all familiar sensation, one he had felt for her for a very long time. Love. Want. Need. He glanced down at his hand, observing the thick red substance that was soaking his fingers, unsure of his next move and then it happened without warning._

_Mercedes grabbed the bowl from his hands, tossing it onto the counter before grabbing his face in her hands, pulling him into the most deep and passionate kiss he had ever experienced in his 17 years. He closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her against him as close as possible. He wanted to be connected to her, experience all that he could of Mercedes Jones. He wanted her and only her for the rest of his life and right now he felt like he was going to experience everything he wanted to. She backed him up against the counter, working her way down his chest and abdomen with her fingers pressed up against his body, feeling his rippled muscles through his shirt, tracing every detail. He let out a soft moan against her lips, making her shiver and smile to herself. She had never wanted someone as bad as she wanted Sam right here and right now. Neither one of them had even gone to second base with anyone and tonight was the night._

_"Arms up. Now." Mercedes ordered against his lips and she opened her eyes, looking straight into his green ones now glazed over with lust.. He smirked as he slowly raised his arms above his head. She smiled and bit her lip as she grasped the bottom of his t-shirt lifting it up as far as she could reach before he pulled it off the rest of the way. She gaped her mouth open as she feasted her eyes on his flawless form. He blushed and pulled at her shirt, making her raise her arms next as he lifted her top up and off. He smiled even bigger than before, showing off the dimples that she loved so much. Sam leaned in, brushing his lips against her ear and jaw making her lean back so he could kiss down her neck while he fiddled with the band of her bra, unhooking it and letting it drop to the floor. Mercedes couldn't help but giggle at his reaction. His eyes opened wide as he studied the beautiful and sexy woman in front of him. He had never seen anything so perfect in his opinion. He dropped to his knees, cupping her breasts in his hands, rubbing them and feeling them with his palms as his lips explored her lower stomach right above the band of her jeans causing her to grab his hair and pull it wanting him so bad._

_"I want you to make love to me Sam..."_

Sam opened his eyes as soon as he heard a phone ring off in the distance, causing him to stop what he was doing and come back to reality. He sat up in bed, wiping his forehead that was beaded with sweat by dragging his wrist across it. He could hear Rachel talking in the living room, no doubt going there to avoid waking up Finn in the bedroom. He was usually not a nosy person, but he was very curious as to who would be calling Rachel at such a late hour.

"What? Are you okay?" She whispered, a deep tone of concern in her voice. "Uh, well, yes...you can come stay...of course." She sounded disoriented, obviously hiding something from whoever was on the other end of that phone call. "No, no, I didn't mean to sound like it wasn't okay, of course it's okay. I want you to be safe and you're my best friend. I'll see you soon. Okay, love you."

Sam looked away from his door, his brain churning, and then his heart dropped. There was only one person that didn't know that he was staying here. The only person that Rachel would be hiding anything from and apparently now, they would both be staying here.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

[A web of lies]

* * *

Mercedes grabbed what she could, heading for the door. She had given her now ex boyfriend what he wanted and now that he was asleep, she was gone. She had never been one to be a pushover or to not fight back, but she wasn't stupid either. The man had 100 pounds on her and she wasn't about to piss him off even more. Besides, she was never coming back anyway. She stared at the note in her hand, making sure she had everything written down that she wanted to say and placed in on the side table close to the door and left. As soon as she stepped outside, she felt relief wash over her. She seemed to always feel this way every time she would walk out on a man, like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. There was only one time that it had hurt her enough to make her cry.

She waved down a taxi and hopped in, taking off towards Rachel and Finn's place. Rachel and Finn were probably the closest friends she had right now. They had been there for her for the past few years, making sure she had food to eat when she was just starting out and she always knew she had a place to stay. The first several months before her career took off were the hardest months of her life and she knew there was no way she would have ever gotten through it all without them. But lately, Rachel had been acting very strange. She kept brushing off her suspicious thoughts, wondering if it was just Rachel being Rachel. But, she had never acted this way...so mysterious and skittish, like she was hiding something. After the bizarre phone call they had just shared, Mercedes was definitely a little more than suspicious.

* * *

"Rachel...you have got to stop pacing. Please!" Finn sat on the edge of the bed watching his wife pace back and forth in front of his, talking to herself with her hands in her hair. She stopped suddenly and turned to face him, a look of panic on her face.

"What are we going to DO?" Rachel threw her hands in the air and caused Finn to lean back a little in fear. "Mercedes is on her way now and she has absolutely no idea that Sam is staying here or even that we know he's in town!" She picked up her hairbrush and started running it through her hair frantically all over her head in a superhuman speed.

"Rachel...what are you doing?" Finn looked at her in the mirror, making eye contact with her before she spun around, throwing her hairbrush in the floor making him jump.

"I HAVE NO IDEA!" She frantically ran to the bathroom, shutting herself inside of it before turning on the water doing God knows what with it. Finn stared at the door for a few minutes, frozen and numb with his eyes wide open. If they could spend one day without some crazy happenings going on, it wouldn't be normal he supposed.

Finn's eyes darted towards the living room as he heard someone knock on the front door. His heart dropped and he started to feel cold. Rachel flew from the bathroom, darting to get to the door before anyone else could open it, hoping that Sam wouldn't emerge from his room. She opened the door, planting an obnoxiously large smile on her face as she greeted Mercedes.

"Come in, come in! Sorry the place is a little messy, that's why I was so jumpy on the phone, I tried to speed clean!" Rachel laughed in a way that Mercedes had never heard her do before and she raised an eyebrow looking from Rachel to her surroundings.

"Rachel...the apartment is spotless like it always is." She dropped her bags and crossed her arms, giving Rachel the look that usually broke her. "What is going on with you? You have been actin' weird for days, now tell me what's up." Rachel nervously looked around, trying to find words to say and opened her mouth to speak before Finn walked in, coming up behind Mercedes and embracing her in a hug, trying to distract from the situation.

"Are you okay?" He asked, looking at her with concern before leaning down to pick up her bags. Mercedes looked back at Rachel then focused back on Finn, relaxing her tone.

"Yes, I'm fine. Don't worry...I'm done with Terrance. He's never been like that with me before, it surprised me. But, I'll be okay. Another hurdle I'll overcome, right?" Finn smirked at her response and looked over to Rachel, a look of concern in his eyes when he remembered that Mercedes couldn't sleep in the guest room...it was occupied.

"Uh...Mercedes, we're gonna let you sleep in our room tonight. You've had a rough day and our bed is more comfortable. We don't mind to take the guest bed." Finn smiled and headed for their bedroom, suitcases in hand. Mercedes looked back at Rachel, a confusion still brewing in her eyes. She wanted to protest and pry for information, but she honestly was too exhausted to be persistent tonight. She followed Finn into their bedroom and Finn came out shortly after, scratching his head while closing the door.

"Finn! What are we supposed to do now? We can't sleep in the guest bed, what am I supposed to do, sleep in the tub?" Rachel snapped, her hands on her hips.

"I was going to suggest the couch, but if you want the tub, you can take it." Finn smiled at her, making her crack into one right after. "Listen, we'll have to tell her the truth in the morning, there's no avoiding it. Let's just let her rest up and have a good night's sleep tonight, she needs it."

"Fine. I just hope she doesn't like, hate me. I should have just told her from the start," Rachel moped over the the couch, plopping down on it beside her husband, laying her head on his shoulder with a pout.

"Everything will be okay, I promise. Let's get some sleep." Finn leaned over to switch off the table lamp, letting darkness fill the living room as he pulled the decorative throw down off the back of the couch, using it to cover them up as they shut their eyes.


	12. Chapter 12

Short chapter guys, I'm sorry!

but, it's something right? ;-)

* * *

**Chapter 12**

[Living in the past]

* * *

Sam laid frozen in his bed, his mind going all over the place knowing what was currently going on in the Hudson household. He had heard everything that had gone on and figured that Rachel and Finn had just assumed he was asleep. All he knew was that Mercedes was just across the hall from him and she had absolutely no idea that this was the case. He tossed and turned not being able to get comfortable with this knowledge. He wondered how Finn and Rachel would break the news to her tomorrow or what would happen if he just went across the hall right now. He'd give anything to be able to crawl into bed with her and wrap his arm around her waist, planting a kiss on the back of her head like he used to do many nights before. He wanted to so bad that he was almost breaking out into a sweat, his toes curling and kicking at his sheets, making them fall off the bed a little, exposing some of the mattress below. He sat up fast, making him light headed and woozy. He rubbed his stomach, a burning sensation starting to form as he rose to his feet. He was so restless, he couldn't stand to just lay there anymore like nothing was going on.

He tiptoed to the bathroom, flipping on the switch and looking in the mirror. He stood there for what felt like an eternity, just staring in frustration. He knew the door next to him led to the room in which Mercedes was currently occupying. He had chosen to go in the master bathroom for a reason. He walked over to it, touching his fingertips to the wooden surface, dragged them down slowly and sighed. It had been so long since he had touched her. It didn't matter how many women he had been with since she left, not one of them could substitute for what he had missing inside of him. There was a massive void, a hole that when he found Mercedes, she had managed to fill. Now he just felt empty and alone. He rested his forehead against the door, thinking back on his life and specific parts of it that he had chosen not to linger on until lately. How much he had hurt her...let her down.

When she had first told him that she was pregnant, an excitement had started to build up inside of him. He hadn't had long to visit thoughts of being a father, he was so young at the time. But, the thought of making something with her, seemed like the best gift that could ever happen to him. But when looking in her eyes, she didn't seem to have that same desire. She seemed...disappointed. Sam never was the sharpest tool in the shed, but he knew her. He knew her better than he even really knew himself and he could tell that she wasn't crazy about the thoughts of having a child right now and he couldn't say he really blamed her. He had promised himself that he would always take care of her, look out for her, and have her best interest at heart. She wanted to go to LA and be a star, not stay stuck in Lima for the rest of her life raising a baby that she didn't even plan. As much as he would love to have this baby with her, he didn't want her to miss out on her big break and he knew she wouldn't make this decision on her own. Asking her to get rid of it probably wasn't what he should've done and especially after seeing how it effected her, it was and has always been his biggest regret.

As he drug his fingernails quietly down the smooth plane in front of him, he unhappily lingered on the memories of her finally dumping him, leaving him behind for the big city not able to even look at him after what he had guilted her into doing. He couldn't really say that he blamed her and after all, he couldn't have expected her to hang on to him while she was in LA making it big and he was stuck there doing nothing. He wanted her back but, with all of her success now he doubted she would want to be with him...especially if she knew the truth. He was a loser, a nobody. Nothing special.

With the daze of everything that was going on in his mind, Sam twisted the doorknob and cracked open the door, finding himself standing in Rachel and Finn's bedroom, glancing upon a very heavily sleeping Mercedes Jones. His heart almost skipped a beat, happy to see her, but realized he shouldn't be there at all. All of the red flags popping up warning him to leave, didn't stop him from advancing. He started to feel like a creep, not wanting to seem like a peeping tom or stalker-ish, but he couldn't help himself. He had nothing to lose and everything to gain. He peeled back the covers beside her, exposing the empty spot that resided behind her back. She was laying on her side, her hand under the pillow that laid beneath her head, her breathing steady and deep. Sam gently crawled in with her, pulling the covers up over him as he moved his arm around her, being careful not to wake her. He was surprised that she didn't even stir, her breathing stayed the same and she didn't seem to mind the sudden advancement. She let out a sigh of content, scaring Sam at first thinking that she was waking up. He smirked as he rested his head on the pillow below, relaxing and closing his eyes. He soaked in the moment, deciding to leave and go back to his guest bed after he enjoyed a few minutes living in the past.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

[Rekindling the fire]

* * *

Mercedes rolled over and her eyes fluttered open. She was not surprised to see Sam's face, as she dreamed about waking up next to him often. Wow, this dream was so realistic though...as hard as she tried, she normally could not get the details of his face this perfect and it felt so...real. She reached out her hand to rub his cheek. It felt warm and soft under her thumb, he stirred a little and made a cute little noise like he always had when disturbed while sleeping. Gosh, this felt so real. It was freaking her out a little. She looked around the room, recognizing that they were not in the bedroom of her parent's old house...they were in...Rachel and Finn's bed? Her eyes widened and she looked back at Sam. She shot out of bed immediately reaching for her suitcase to throw on some clothes realizing how under-dressed she was, the loudness of her shuffling waking Sam up.

Sam's eyes shot open, then realizing the situation he left the bed like a rocket as well, muttering a few curses under his breath. He definitely had meant to wake up and be gone way before now. Mercedes turned and looked at him, a look of horror and confusion spread across her face. Then he realized he himself wasn't really wearing the appropriate amount of clothes. He covered himself as best as possible...after all, it was morning...

"What are you doing here?" She finally managed to choke out, her heart beating a mile a minute. Sam looked around, not really knowing what to say. He hated to rat Rachel out, but this was a pretty sticky situation. "Start talking, Sam." Mercedes had her hands on her hips, a stern look in her eyes. This was a stance in which Sam always hated to see, knowing every time it meant he had screwed up. He relaxed and looked off to his side, chewing on his lip before starting to talk.

"Okay, I'm sorry. I'm staying with Rachel and Finn while I'm in town. They didn't want me to have to get a hotel. It's only for a few more days, and I dunno, I heard you come in last night and I know I should've stayed in my own bed, but I missed being next to you and I know you had had a hard night and just wanted to take care of you." Sam panted for breath, it had taken all he had to blurt out that long sentence. He watched as Mercedes took the info in, soaking it up and not really liking any of it. She looked at him, mouth open and her hands balled up into fists.

"So Finn and Rachel have known you were here this whole time?" She asked, her lip quivering in what Sam only assumed was anger. He hadn't really seen her angry that often, she normally was a mild tempered person. He understood why this whole situation was eating at her and he felt bad. It was mostly all his fault anyway and on top of it all, he had lied to her and she didn't even know that part.

Sam shrugged his shoulders...a stupid response. She shook her head and walked past him and out the door leaving him with an angry sigh. His hands moved to his face, once again finding himself in a situation that he didn't know how to really get out of. He heard talking in the livingroom, what he only assumed to be confrontation. He turned to leave the room and headed for the guest bedroom where he pulled on a thin cotton t-shirt and some sweatpants before going to the bathroom to splash some water on his face. He felt this was gonna be a long day.

"Mercedes, please don't leave! I'm sorry, I'm really really sorry, I just didn't want to upset you and-" Sam shot his gaze over towards the voices, hearing Rachel pleading for Mercedes not to go. He turned and left for the livingroom before he could really process what he was doing. He walked in, seeing Rachel standing with Mercedes, trying to beg her for forgiveness and Finn standing backed away from them, his arms crossed with a worried look on his face. They all turned to look at him as he walked in, Mercedes turning to walk towards the front door. Sam reacted fast and ran over to grab Mercedes' arm, pulling her away from the door.

"Sam, you better let go of me right now." She turned to look at him, hurt in her eyes now. He made eye contact with her, his eyes starting to water as he gave her the most intense look he's ever shared with anyone, not wanting to see her walk out of any door again because of him. Mercedes stopped resisting his hold on her, relaxing her expression as she looked at his face. She looked in his eyes, full of regret and apologies. She never really could resist his gorgeous green eyes, they always made her weak and vulnerable. She didn't want to stay, to have to face everything she had been avoiding for the past few years, but now she felt like she couldn't leave either. She was so angry with her best friend for lying to her, but looking around the room at the three faces that were pleading with her to stay, she finally got Sam to let go of her and she slouched over to the couch in which she planted herself on. She looked around at everyone, watching them look at eachother for the next move. "If any one of you lie to me again, you're gonna seriously regret it." She quipped, making them all look down.

Sam's heart dropped. Rachel and Finn probably felt relieved right now, knowing they were completely off the hook. He, however, still knew the lies he had still lingering. His glance shot over to Finn as he offered to fix everyone breakfast. Sam felt a little hungry, but at the same time didn't really want to eat after all of this excitement. He instead just volunteered to help.

Mercedes sat on the couch, still numb from the shock of previous events. How was she going to be able to handle being around Sam for a few days? It was making her uncomfortable already and the fact that his ass looked extremely fine in those pants, wasn't helping either. She looked up, watching him as he helped Finn make breakfast, his hair a little ruffled from sleep and his arm muscles bulging from the tight t-shirt he had on. She even let a small smirk through as she noted the hint of stubble on his face. He had really grown up on her. He was a man now...a very handsome and...sexy man. She had always been extremely attracted to Sam, as were most girls she knew. But, seeing him now...all grown up, she had wondered when this had happened. He looked like he had been forced to hit this point, aged more through some rough times. She figured most of those hard times were probably caused by her, but, what had he been up to all of these years? She was glad for his sudden success, but surprised as well. She honestly didn't think he would've tried to make it in the music business. She had always believed in him, but he never seemed to want it like she did.

Rachel looked at Mercedes, noticing her long stares towards Sam and smiled. She wanted so bad for them to get back together. They were perfect and everyone knew it. At that moment, Rachel decided she was going to do everything in her power to make this happen. She could be cupid, she already had enough to work with! After all, she could do anything she set her mind to and this weekend, was going to be spectacular on every level. She jumped up, going to her room for planning leaving Mercedes behind to continue in her gawking.

Mercedes hadn't realized how long she had been staring at Sam, turning away when he caught her looking his way. Sam wasn't stupid and she knew he could tell what she was doing when he occasionally lifted his shirt to wipe off his face as he cooked. She shook her head, a smile planted on her face as she watched his hard earned abs exposing themselves to her. She snapped out of her trance when Rachel came flying back into the room, a huge smile on her face.

"Okay, so, tonight we are going to have a really nice dinner out to celebrate opening night tomorrow. I'm gonna invite everyone and I want you guys to dress up really really nice, okay?" Finn looked over at his wife, a look of disappointment on his face conveying his thoughts of 'Ugh, do we have to?' before going back to making the eggs. "You better be making something that I can eat, dear!" She added on to her statement as she bounded into the kitchen.

Sam looked over at Mercedes and smirked. She returned the gesture as she thought of what she could wear tonight. She definitely wasn't planning on rekindling any old flames...but, she always loved to tease.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

[The first move.]

* * *

Sam slipped off into the guest room. It was finally time to start getting ready for dinner and he felt like his ears were bleeding. He loved spending several hours with his friends, especially since it had been so long since he had seem them. But, man he had forgotten how much Rachel loved to talk. He stood at the foot of his bed for a minute, staring at three different outfits that he had laid out for himself to pick from. He scratched his chin and stared for a few more minutes then decided he better pick one since they magically weren't going to choose for him. He had done more shopping than he had ever done in his life the day before he left for New York. He had wanted to look his best, look the part. All he had to his name before were a few worn out t-shirts and some ripped jeans. He figured none of those clothing items would do him any good here. So far, he had been right.

He picked out a nice pair of dark wash jeans and a white button up with a fitted black blazer and tie. He wanted to go simple, but still dressed up. He didn't want to seem like he was trying too hard. He strolled off to the guest bathroom, taking his clothes off as he went, and turned on the shower.

Down the hall, Mercedes found herself searching for something to wear as well. She hadn't brought all of her clothes, so it was making her choices slim. She gasped in surprise as she found one of her favorite dresses at the bottom of one of her bags. She reached for it, grabbing it quicker than she meant to, so excited at her find. It was a satin red dress that stopped above the knees, low cut and form fitting in all of the right places. She reached for her other bag, digging out her fire engine red pumps and some bling to top it all off. She stopped and noted that she hadn't been this excited to dress up in a long time. She knew she was gorgeous, she didn't have to try to look good for anyone, but at this moment, she wanted to micro manage every detail to make sure she looked as perfect as possible.

As the the next hour went on, everyone in the apartment was rushing to look their best. Rachel and Finn were already ready, waiting for Mercedes and Sam to make their appearance in the living room.

Mercedes took one last final glance at herself in the mirror, curling the last strand of hair and letting it fall down her shoulder. She had styled her hair in loose curls all around and they hung long and beautiful down her chest. She had gone with a smokey eye makeup and red lipstick to match her outfit. She was happy with the reflection that was looking back at her. She looked hot. No, she looked FINE. She couldn't wait to see the look on Sam's face when she-. Mercedes stopped her thoughts, realizing that she had meant to think "the look on everyone's face". All of a sudden a rush of nerves filled her body, something that she didn't feel very often. She was a very strong and confident woman, no one really made her feel this way and she remembered how she had said that very thing when she first saw Sam. That same nervous feeling she had felt at the pit of her stomach when he first smiled at her, she was now feeling again almost more than ever. She always felt a rush of confusion when this happened to her, not being able to control her feelings, to compose herself. She felt extremely vulnerable and naked all of a sudden. Almost like the ball wasn't in her court anymore. She slammed her fist against the sink then brought the same hand to her forehead, wiping away the slight perspiration forming out of frustration.

"Okay cedes...get yourself together. You have the power here, don't let him make you this weak." She looked up in the mirror again, letting herself relax and calm down. She closed her eyes and let out a deep breath then turned to open the door and step in to whatever was coming next. She felt her breath leave her as she looked across the hall at Sam who had just happened to step out at the same time. What a great coincidence she thought to herself sarcastically. He looked...breathtaking. Her heart started to beat faster as she fought for control again. Her palms started to produce moisture as she started breathing shallow. He was looking at her with those eyes. Those beautiful and kind eyes that no matter how much trouble Sam got himself into, always seemed to retain a certain innocence. He stood there frozen in the doorway, his hand still slightly on the doorknob as he fought for the movement to actually finish closing the door behind him. He ran his tongue across his full bottom lip, making Mercedes' eyes dart to that spot, causing her to repeat the action herself. She wanted so badly to just grab him and kiss him, feeling those lips on hers again would light a fire in her soul that she had been practically starving for, begging for. Just thinking about this made her start to tingle between her legs under her knockout dress that she had so carefully put on, but now was wanting to just rip off. Sam was the best sex she ever had and honestly the only guy that could do anything for her...basically, he drove her crazy. The way he would work his lips against her skin, nip at all the right places, and lord the man could do magic with his hands. Her favorite part though, was the little sensual noises he would make right into her ear in reaction to the way she was making him feel was the icing on the cake.

Sam wasn't taking this in an easy stride either. He stood there like a statue knowing he needed to move, to speak, to do anything, but stand there like an idiot halfway out the door. He nearly passed out when he saw Mercedes walk out of the adjacent room. The dress, those shoes, that body! She looked classy, yet sexy and any ounce of confidence that he had felt when he decided to leave that room, was now long gone down the cleavage of Mercedes Jones that his eyes did not want to run away from. He had tried to speak several times, but apparently his voice was not working. His lips became dry from the effort, so he ran his tongue against his lip, moistening it for another try. Calculus was hard, but damn, at this moment in time talking seemed to be something he forgot to study for. His free hand shook a little as he fought not to reach out and grab her. He felt like a whiny boy inside, throwing a fit because he couldn't just force a move on her and take what he wanted. He wanted her so bad it was starting to make him sweat and the layered blazer wasn't helping. After a few minutes of gawking, her finally pushed out some words, trying to string them together in a way that made any sense.

"You...look stun-ning." He croaked, his hand finally pulling the door to a close behind him. He cleared his throat and cracked a smirk when she blushed and smiled at his compliment. Making Mercedes blush was one of his favorite things to do in life, and after thinking he'd never get to see it again, he felt a sense of accomplishment.

Mercedes brushed a piece of hair back behind her ear, fighting to gain back control she turned her smile into a wicked grin and left him with "I know." Before turning on her heels and strutting her stuff down the hallway. Sam swallowed hard, falling back against the wall and cursing lightly under his breath. She was a stone cold fox and he was literally dying because of it.

The whole limo ride to dinner was even more torture. Sam and Mercedes ended up beside eachother, leg touching leg as they scooted in. Sam flashed a smirk her way and she quickly turned her head trying not to look at him too long. "Are we picking everyone up?" She asked Rachel who was on the other side of her, grinning ear to ear.

"Well we are piking up Quinn and Puck. We'll meet everyone else there." Rachel patted Mercedes on the leg then turned to Finn and began lightly bouncing up and down way too excited for her own good. "Aren't you excited? Look excited, Finn!"

Finn looked at her with a half smile, weakly waving his arms in the air followed by a pathetic "woo!". Sam couldn't help but chuckle, they were comical. He started to feel excited now at the news of seeing Quinn and Puck. He missed them dearly and couldn't wait to actually see them face to face. They sat in the limo for a good ten minutes before Rachel squeaked that they were nearing their pickup spot. They rolled to a stop and the driver opened the door to reveal the smiling faces of their two old friends. Puck flew into the limo with a low roar and attacked Finn in an abrupt tackle. They both laughed it off as they greeted eachother, Quinn finally following inside muttering "What happened to ladies first?" to Puck. She quickly turned her head, recognizing that there was an extra person in the limo then her eyes grew wide at realizing who it was. "Sam?". Sam immediately realized that his presence was a surprise to them and couldn't help but smile. It was fun to see the looks on their faces.

Sam let out an "ummph" as Puck attacked him next, shouting 'Troutymouth' in an excited tone. Sam smiled and hugged Puck, patting him on the back then begging him to let go before he squeezed the life out of him. He hugged an offering Quinn next, rubbing her back and grinning at her familiar scent. She had grown her hair out again, but it was darker now, matching her eyebrows and really making her eyes pop even more than before. She looked really pretty he thought, and happy now which made him happy in return. He still loved Quinn as a friend, but dropped his feelings for her as soon as he pursued Mercedes. He had thought that he had loved Quinn, but those feelings that were there never came close to the burning desire he harbored in his heart for Mercedes and seeing both of them together now in his presence, he knew that completely.

"Oh my gosh, what in the world are you doing here? It's so great to see you." Quinn smiled the biggest she knew how after asking the question. Sam could tell they were both truly genuine about their excitement of seeing him which made him relax and feel more comfortable. He glanced over to Mercedes, noticing she didn't seem quite as engaged in the current topic, her gaze somewhat glazed over in a generic expression. She was smiling, but it was definitely out of respect. His first instinct was to reach over and grab her hand like he always did when he wanted to reassure her that things were okay. But, the thought that he couldn't was weighing on him heavy like a room full of bricks.

"I was in town and I wanted to see you guys and see Rachel's play, of course. But that's not important, tell me about you guys. You got married?" He purposely steered the conversation away from himself, not even wanting to go there again. He listened half heartedly as they explained their relationship and how everything came to be. Part of him still hung on Mercedes like it usually did, wondering what she was thinking and how he could make her smile. He decided to bite the bullet and make a ballsy move. He sat his hand down next to hers so that they touched. Just a test to see if she would pull away. To his surprise, she didn't, and he made the move to grab her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze before anyone could notice and he pulled it away. He wasn't about to do anything too spontaneous. If he was going to win her back, he was going to do it the right way and ease into it. He didn't want to push her away.


	15. Chapter 15

Hahaha I just now realized that the first move was in the 14th chapter.

Thank you guys for holding tight for so long. I know this is going slow :-P 

I tend to like to drag things out, because I'm mean like that. Let me know if it's too slow.

* * *

**Chapter 15**

[You're the one that I want]

* * *

Dinner was fun, Mercedes had to admit. Having the whole crew together again was one of the best things any of them could ask for at this time in their lives. They were all so successful and almost stress free, not having to worry about grades or competing Glee clubs. But, if there was one thing that was still lingering around from high school, it was the non ability to fight the inevitable between her and Sam. She always found herself for whatever reason, trying to deny the connection that they had. Even one gentle sweep of his fingers against her arm drove chills down her spine. He was such a dork, sitting there not really knowing what to do with his utensils at a fine dining restaurant and the way he tucked his napkin in his collar was making her strain not to laugh. Somehow he balanced her out, she thought. She was very strong willed and confident. She was very modern, very trendy. She never took crap from anyone and always told it like it is. Sam, well, he was just different. he was very calm natured, although he didn't care to make a fool of himself. He thought the way he acted was funny, even if no one else would agree. He was old fashioned and well mannered, except for when he had food all over his face, like at this point in time. He was simple, but sexy and she couldn't help but feel this immense desire for him.

Mercedes blushed when she looked over at Sam. He was smiling at her, his dimples in full bloom, his green eyes sparkling in the light of the lamp hanging above their table. She started feeling those feelings again. The ones that she had felt almost every time she looked at Sam. The ones that she couldn't feel with any other guy and she had almost given up on ever feeling them again. It was like they had never even had time apart. She jerked her glance away from him when the sound of Quinn's voice interrupted her thoughts.

"Sam, they're having open mic night. You should go play us one of your songs." Quinn crossed her arms on the table, smiling reassuringly towards Sam, making everyone else turn their attention to him as well. Sam's cheeks flushed red, suddenly the center of attention. His heart started to race a little, feeling all of his stories about to backfire in his face. He cleared his throat and shrugged his shoulders slightly.

"I don't have my guitar in here or anything." He looked around the table, his throat becoming dry as sweat formed on his palms. This was the moment that he thought everyone was bound to see straight through him. He knew he had to look suspicious, or stupid sitting there like a nervous 14 year old about to ask a girl to the school dance.

"You guys, leave Sam alone! He'll show us his stuff when he's ready." Rachel beamed at the head of the table, her jewelry sparkling in the light, almost blinding Sam when his glance shot her way but, he wasn't gonna complain. She saved his ass. Sam smirked at her response, and continued to blush looking down. He did actually have some songs written, although he knew they probably were nothing special. Not like anything his friends could write in comparison anyway. Mercedes held a soft expression when she looked back at Sam this time. She knew him pretty well, even though they hadn't seen eachother in awhile. She knew when he blushed, he was second guessing himself. She reached for his hand, squeezing it softly.

"I'm sure your songs are really good." She whispered. Not really intending to be quiet, but gentle. Sam was shocked at how kind she was being towards him. He had expected total bitterness, maybe even the silent treatment. But, she was being really supportive and sweet, the qualities that she had dished to him during their relationship. He looked at her, a smile creeping on his face. He didn't feel the need to respond verbally, this moment was enough. He looked around the table again at his friends. Every was paired off and seemingly happy in their relationship. He was happy for them, but at the same time sadness was beginning to form in the pit of his stomach. No matter how nice Mercedes was being, this simulated relationship that they were displaying at the table wasn't real to it's core and everyone knew that. Their chemistry was undeniable, and so was the fact that they were happy to see eachother again, but at the end of the day, they would both leave from here just friends.

Mercedes finally let go of Sam's hand, bringing both of her own hands to her lap, fiddling her thumbs around and chewing on her lip. She knew she was coming on a little too strong and after all, what message was she trying to put across anyway? She hadn't come here with the intension of getting Sam back or even hinting towards it. It's almost as like she was floating above her body, unable to control what she was doing. It was comfortable to be in this role with Sam. Heck, it was what she knew best. Sitting next to him without feeling like a part of him seemed like an impossible action. They had been through so much together and she had thought it would be easier than it had been to separate herself from him completely, but no matter how far apart they were or how little they talked, he was still the subject of her mind. She looked over to Rachel, noting her excessively winking at her, egging on her actions. Mercedes gave Rachel a look, causing her to look away and back to Finn who was ranting on about something that Mercedes hadn't cared to invest her attention in.

Mercedes had noticed that she had kicked back quite a few cocktails, not really paying much attention to how many she'd ordered. It was making her feel relaxed, taking away all of the negative thoughts away from her. She started to feel dizzy and warm and well, good. She smirked looking around at everyone who was getting a little buzzed as well. Everyone had just seemed to drop the fact they Sam had been MIA for four years and that they all had any sort of responsibility. They were just having pure unadulterated fun and Sam was all smiles. Oh how she loved Sam's smile, she thought. He looked so cute with his dimples and his perfect teeth and his...hair! Oh my god those..cheeks! They're so cute and pudgy and ah! She was really feeling drunk at this point. She reached out and pinched one, making Sam jump and look at her surprised.

"Cedes, are you okay?" He asked her with a cute little laugh after. She smiled and nodded slowly, giggling like a young school girl. Sam couldn't help but laugh. He had never seem Mercedes drunk before and this was definitely entertaining. He was starting to feel buzzed as well, taking a few more sips out of his beer. He started feeling a little discouraged knowing that she was only being so friendly towards him because of the alcohol in her system. He kept drinking, hoping to numb out all of the anxiety he was having. He had decided earlier that evening that he was going to make the next move on miss Mercedes Jones and he needed an extra push to help him follow through with it.

Mercedes was really feeling the alcohol now, her vision was getting slightly cloudy and all she could think about if she was being honest, was getting Sam in the sack. She never really found herself to feel sexually frustrated but right now in this moment, she was really craving some white chocolate. She couldn't think very straight at the moment and she really had no idea what everyone else was doing or conversing about at the table. She moved her hand to Sam's leg, squeezing it every once in awhile and slowly making her way up his thigh. Sam tried not to react to it, afraid that this wasn't really even happening. He couldn't believe how flirty she was being, but he loved it. Maybe this was going to be easier than he had initially thought. He shuttered as he felt her hand get so close to his growing erection that he was sure he was going to just pass out at any moment. But, she pulled away. He let out the breath he had been holding for several seconds and hunched over a little, breathing heavy and trying to keep his cool. She hadn't forgotten how to tease, that was for sure.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

[To the past and back.]

* * *

Everything going on at this moment was a total blur. Things began to slow down as Sam realized that they were back at Finn and Rachel's house, both he and Mercedes pulling at each other's clothes, tossing them to the ground in a heated frenzy. He couldn't believe this was happening and he almost felt bad knowing that Mercedes was very intoxicated and that he was probably taking advantage of her. He parted his lips, as if to protest going any further, but the burning desire he had for her was pushing all sense from his mind. He wanted his hands all over her, touching her, caressing her, grabbing her. He had dreamed about this moment for so long. Just being able to be in the same room with her again was almost overwhelming, but this...

Mercedes moved her hands up to his chest, pushing on it making him step backwards slightly. He was still a little woozy, stepping on his belt buckle with an audible crunch. His mind started to wander, getting distracted and thinking about everything that could go wrong and afraid he was going to make a fool of himself. A lump formed in his throat, taking her slight push as her protest of any progression from this point. But suddenly he was overcome with deja vu, jumping back in time to the moment that they first made love as he watched the same expression form on her face. That devilish grin...that look of pure lust in her eyes. He swallowed hard, trying to control his breathing, which was an effort that proved noneffective. She was so beautiful. More beautiful than anyone or anything he had ever seen. So many things reminded him of her, but nothing would ever make his heart race or make him feel more complete than standing right here with her, knowing that she wanted him and wasn't going to walk out the door.

The lights were streaming in the window from the streets outside the apartment. Lights from famous marquees and billboards from all the great Broadway shows and extravagant ads that NYC had to offer. It created a mood in the room unlike anything Sam or Mercedes had ever felt. Mercedes felt like she was looking out the window at her present, to her past when she glanced at Sam. Except, at this moment she was looking at a different Sam. An older, sexier Sam with his new rugged physique. He had gone from a boy to a very desirable man. She watched as his arm moved up to run his fingers through his hair, his arm muscles making themselves known as he moved his arm back down to his side. She gazed over his abs, taking in each one like a long anticipated meal. She slowly lifted her eyes to meet his, almost losing her breath at the sight of his familiar green eyes, noting the reflection of light that made them sparkle even more. His tongue darted out to lick his lips, moistening them to a plump perfection. His hair was tousled from the makeout session that had just previously occurred but it looked sexy with flecks on blonde running threw it that were repeated in the scruff that graced his face, leaving her eyes to finish at his amazingly cute chin dimple. She began to walk towards him, dropping off her final article of clothing, letting it hit the floor with the rest of their clothes.

"Mercedes..." Sam started, stopping after feeling Mercedes press a finger to his open lips. A grin formed on his lips as she smiled, pulling her finger away slowly before muttering "Shut up." Sam reached for her hips, feeling her warm skin underneath his fingers, making him grab on to her with a severe want that he hadn't felt with any other girl or woman he had been with in his lifetime. Mercedes let out a small groan as she offered a kiss to him, meeting him halfway in the most passionate kiss she had ever shared. Her knees began to buckle and she felt like there was no way she was going to be able to handle all of this excitement. Her heart was racing fast in her chest and she knew that Sam had to feel it too the way his muscular chest was pushing against hers. An unexpected moan escaped her lips as she felt something else pressing against her. Something that she desperately wanted to "reconnect" with.

Sam guided Mercedes to the bed, letting her fall back on it, making sure he watched her closely as she scooted to a preferred position. He licked his lips, wanting to take her all in as much as he could not knowing when their next encounter would be. Mercedes looked at Sam, a look of vulnerability now in place of her previous want. "Sam. Are you sure this is a good idea?" She managed to get out, looking away to avoid his reaction. There she went again, being completely vulnerable to the only man or person that could make her feel that way. Sam crawled closer to her, hovering above her as he moved his hand to her cheek, rubbing it lightly with his thumb. She began to melt at his touch, hot tears forming in her eyes as if she was being brought back to life, finally able to feel again. She grabbed his hand, holding it against her face not wanting it to end. She had missed him so much...missed hearing his voice and feeling his skin against hers. He rubbed his lips against her ear, breathing against it and kissing on it. He whispered "Shut up." before smiling and gently nibbling on her earlobe, receiving a small giggle from Mercedes. Oh yeah, she was definitely not going to backtrack now.

Sam positioned himself between her legs, making her open them to receive his requested position. He bent over her, running his fingers up through her hair and grabbing on to it as he pulled her in to a welcomed open mouthed kiss. She tasted so sweet on his tongue as he massaged it with hers, breathing in deep as if taking in some fresh air. Her hands fell down Sam's toned back, feeling every detail as he moved, grinding against her and making her almost gasp for air. Her hands landed on his perfect ass, one of her favorite attributes that he possessed. She lifted her hips, meeting him in his movements to show she was ready for any progression that he wished to make. Sam was ready to be in her, to feel her completely engulf him and bring his body back to life. For a moment, he visited the thought that Rachel and Finn were only across the hall, a thought that should have probably stopped him from advancing forward, but as soon a the thought came, it was thrown out. He lifted up slightly, looking at Mercedes as if requesting a sign to move on to the next level, to which she bit her lip and answered his silent question. He began to ease into her, not sure of her current sensitivity and honestly as horny as he was, he felt like he could break her with his built up need to devour her.

His lips dropped back down beside her ear as he let out a long soft moan, making Mercedes shiver from head to toe. He sounded so hot. Feeling him inside of her again did things to her that she definitely had forgotten about. She curled her toes tightly, holding her breath as she let herself feel the sensations run all through her body and exciting all of her senses. She wanted to speak, to tell Sam that there was no way she was going to be able to last much longer, but her voice was trapped in an effort to breathe just enough to survive all of the amazing sensations she was feeling right now. From the looks of the skilled and hard working man on top of her, she figured that he was thinking the same thing. He brought his lips to her neck, lightly grazing it, knowing how crazy it made her feel. He let out a breathy and muffled moan against her skin before mumbling that he was about to cum. Mercedes finally let out some noise, moaning Sam's name which brought him over the edge to his climax, in turn bring Mercedes to hers.

Sam collapsed on the bed beside her, his chest heaving up and down in effort to catch his lost breath. He felt Mercedes move around beside him after a few minutes, turning on her side to face him, her head propped up on her hand as she looked at him. He could tell she was deep in thought and he hoped that it wasn't thoughts of regret. What she said next was far from what he was expecting.

"Sam...I haven't been totally honest with you." She said hesitantly, biting her bottom lip before looking away. He turned on his side, looking at her expression as confusion filled his mind.

"What do you mean?" He racked his brain for clues, not knowing what she could possibly have been dishonest about. But, it almost made him feel better knowing that he himself was hiding a few things as well.

Mercedes was fighting for words, not really even believing that she was going to tell Sam the truth about a secret she had kept inside of her all of this time. It was almost as if she was hovering above her body, watching the scene go down, unable to control her next move. "When I told you that I had gotten rid of...our baby." Mercedes couldn't look at Sam, she knew if she did she wouldn't be able to finish what she wanted to say. "I lied." Her lips began to quiver as her body started to shake. She had recited those words a million times in her head, trying to play out what would happen if she were ever to tell Sam that this whole time he was a father.

Sam stared at Mercedes, his mouth hanging open out of shock. He tried to process what she had just said, but somehow it wasn't working very well. "You...didn't get rid of the baby." He managed to choke out, proceeding with his next question after receiving a headshake from Mercedes. "Did you give it up for adoption?" Mercedes covered her face with her hands, trying to hide the strong emotions that were coming the the surface that she hadn't allowed herself to feel in a very long time.

"Yes. I gave her up for adoption. I couldn't raise her and be successful at the same time. I couldn't get rid of her Sam, but I couldn't keep her either." Sam's heart was racing, small clues starting to fall in to place as he pieced together the situation.

"Who...who adopted her, Mercedes?" He asked in a stern tone, knowing in the back of his mind what her response was going to be.

"Brittany and Santana. They wanted a baby and I could trust them to take care of her and give her what she needed. A home and a family and two parents." Sam brought his hand to his mouth, taking in the fact that he had actually met his daughter before, and had tried to push out the thoughts that she looked familiar. "Her name is Zoey."


	17. Chapter 17

_This is the final chapter you guys. Thaks so much for_

_reading and being such great support :-) I have loved writing_

_this story and can't wait to write more Samcedes goodness in the future._

**Chapter 17**

[The end of the beginning]

* * *

Sam felt cold as ice as he laid there, flat on his back staring at the ceiling in great detail as a bead of sweat rolled down the side of his face. His life had changed so much in the past week, he thought to himself. Then he began to wonder...had his life really changed that much so fast, or was he just now realizing his life? So many nights he had found himself wondering who he was or what he was supposed to do. What was his next step? He found himself becoming frustrated as he searched his mind for answers, for a way to just feel like everything was gonna be okay. He ached to feel like that carefree 17 year old boy again.

His hand found it's way to his forehead, resting on it, rubbing his temples trying to relax the pain of his unrelentless thinking. Why wasn't he falling asleep? He had tossed back some nyquil that he had scavenged from Rachel and Finn's cabinets, hoping that it would knock him out enough to distract him from the reality of what just happened. Mercedes had not only had drunken sex with him, but had blurted out that he was a father as well. A number of different emotions were welling up inside of him, ranging all the way from excitement, to being completely terrified. The fact that he had a child with Mercedes, was something that he had always wanted from day one. It was something he dreamed about and longed for, but the fact that he had missed out on raising their child and that she doesn't even know who he is, wasn't a thought that pleased him. It was his fault that it had happened this way, but he was also upset that Mercedes didn't tell him the truth. Truth. Something that he himself couldn't be mad at Mercedes for.

He let out a groan, knowing that the truth was eventually going to have to come out. The truth that he was a nobody. A deadbeat...and broke. He also thought about how even though Mercedes had been intimate with him only a few hours before this very moment, she had also been very intoxicated and would most likely regret it in the morning. He also thought...he was thinking too much. He looked around the room, studying the details like he had done so many times since he had been here. He was starting to feel uneasy about his surroundings. Not being able to remember certain items in the room or feeling like things looked different from time to time. He had only been to New York two times and yet he always somehow managed to know where he was going, but couldn't remember how he had gotten there. He rubbed his temple again, now feeling it pounding beneath his fingertips. He remembered at that point that he had gotten the shit beaten out of him awhile back. An event that now...he couldn't quite remember what for or who by. What was wrong with him? Had it messed with his brain? Was he loosing his mind?

He felt hands suddenly on his body. A familiar touch that crept up his body and through his hair. He opened his eyes to see Mercedes, looking into his eyes and biting her lip. She seemed to be the only thing that made sense to him anymore. The only thing that could make him smile or feel like he had any hope. It felt like lately, all he had to do was want to see her with everything he had in him and she would be there, almost like they were attached by an invisible teather like Sue Sylvester had described having with her sister all those years ago. It's like she knew that he needed her, craved her, desired her. The previous years that he had spent without her, all seemed like a blur now. Heck, he couldn't even really remember what he had been doing. It had become strange to him that he could remember all of the times that he had spent with Mercedes like they were just yesterday, but he could barely remember what he had had for breakfast that morning or where.

He closed his eyes as he felt Mercedes rub his cheek with her thumb like she had done so many times before when they would lay together. He thought he had heard her mutter something, but maybe she hadn't. He didn't want to break the moment so he didn't ask. Instead he just took in the feeling, parting his lips as he felt hers lightly pressing against the skin of his neck, making him shiver as she lingered on his weak spots. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him and eventually drifting off to sleep, thinking about his daughter. Their daughter.

* * *

Sam's eyes fluttered open as he looked around, squinting at the sun beams coming in through the window. He quickly sat up, blinking repeatedly trying to comprehend what he was seeing. He brought his hands up in front of his face, studying them as closely as he could. No scars, no evidence of hard work or a rough lifestyle. He felt his face, smooth with lack of stubble. Youthful, like his face had felt so many years ago. He looked over and locked his eyes on his cell phone. He reached for it, picking it up in a frenzy, and hurriedly unlocking the screen to note that this wasn't only his cell phone, but his old cell phone from high school. His heart pounded in a quick pace as he began to realize what was going on. Was that whole thing a dream? He hurridly typed in the first name that came to mind and stared at the screen for a moment before calling Mercedes Jones. He wasn't shocked when her voicemail played back in his ear, but an overwhelming feeling of content comforted his nerves as he relaxed to the familiar sounding voicemail that she had recorded while they were together. He cleared his throat and began to speak.

"There are many moments in my life that I wish I could take back. Things I've said or things that I've done. Maybe a time that I've fibbed to my parents about where I was or being desperate enough to become a stripper, ha. Most of all though, I regret what I said to you...and what I've done to us. But, with all the regets and mistakes that we make in life as humans, sometimes we forget the blessings that fall in our paths. Every person has a dark side. What defines a person with good character is not a life of constant kindness, smiles and patience. But, it's the effort to learn from your mistakes, to apply those lessons, make amends for them and choose not to repeat them that defines a good person. I've looked ahead into my future...and I don't like my life without you. I've seen what we missed out on...What I missed out on. I want you to keep the baby, Mercedes. I want to be the father that I know I can be and I want to do that for you and for us. I hope you can forgive me. I love you..."

Sam couldn't believe the second chance he had been given. The birds were singing outside like he had never heard before. The smell of his mom's cooking filled his nostrils like it used to do on a Saturday morning. His body felt refreshed and energized, the aching of heartache and regret no longer filled his essence and most importantly, he didn't have to lie anymore. He jumped out of bed, enjoying being in his old room as he scrounged around for clothes. His smile couldn't be bigger as he soaked in that all of his previous endeavors could still come true, he could still make something out of himself and even have his lady. If she would forgive him. He jumped when he heard his mom calling him from the kitchen. Something that definitely had annoyed him before, but now he greatly welcomed.

"Sam. You have a visitor!" She called, causing Sam's heart to skip a beat knowing most likely who it would be. He composed himself after throwing on some clothes and walking to the front door, flashing a smile his mom's way, happy to see her. He opened the door to see Mercedes, just how he had remembered her. As beautiful as ever. He noted that she looked a little confused, her phone in hand. He couldn't make himself talk, he was overwhelmed and smiling from ear to ear.

"Sam..." She quietly started, motioning for him to come outside away from anyone else. "Your message...I..." Sam stopped her by grabbing her shoulders, making her look into his eyes.

"I meant every word of it. I hope you can forgive me...I've missed you so much." Mercedes' expression now turned into one much more confused that perviously.

"Sam, what are you talking about? I just saw you yesterday and...how did you know? How did you know that I was pregnant?" Sam froze. Was most of what happened all part of his dream? Had he not even made the big mistake that regretted the most?

"I had a dream...that you were pregnant an that i didn't want you to keep it...but, I do." Mercedes searched Sam's eyes, then reached out to embrace him, burrying her face into his chest as hot tears soaked through his tshirt and rested against his skin.

Mercedes couldn't believe that he knew. She had already been on her way to talk about it with him when she got his message. His words had been very sweet, but she had no idea what he was talking about. She didn't have the energy to question anything anymore. All she knew was being here right now in his arms was all that she needed. It was the only thing that made sense. She had been afraid he wouldn't react well to the news, but the fact that he wanted to keep it brought tears to her eyes.

Sam sighed in content as he looked up into the sky, watching the clouds slowly move with the wind. He had been given a second chance, an opportunity to make things right. He smiled as he watched Mercedes enter the house, helping his mom get ready for breakfast, the sight of it all warming his heart and was seemingly perfect. He sat down at the table, ready to stuff his face with his mom's cooking before looking up when he heard her voice.

"Sam i've been meaning to ask you, have you seen our credit card?"


	18. Hey Guys!

Hello, all!

Yes, it's been ages since this story has ended, however, I was wondering if you all would be interested in a Previous Endeavors sequel? If so, please let me know either on here or my tumblr: .com and I think I may get a start on it!

Thanks guys! Love ya!


End file.
